And Brigitte Bardot! Oh, and that Sophia Loren, she never left me alone. Then there was that NAAFI girl who served the tea in the barrack canteen. And I was very young to be taken advantage of in that fashion. Worst of all was the year I was serving Her Maj and living in a tent on the end of runway #2 at Bahrein airport, those hussies kept abusing me on a constant basis, in fact the 'Tom' in the next camp-bed to mine complained about it! Anyway, I have consulted my distinguished solicitors, Messrs. Whyte, Lippe & Tremblin, although to be honest I'm not totally sure which one I saw because they all look alike. Anyway, Messr. 'whichever' was most encouraging and assured me that I had a very good case and they would be only too pleased to argue it all the way to the High Court; although, to be honest, I was a little hurt when he insisted on his fees being paid up-front! Anyway, as the entire country seems set upon suing everybody else for sexual harrassment I don't see why I shouldn't have my day in court, I mean, you'd never believe the things those women did to me . . .
ADDITIONAL: That old devil coincidence strikes again. My somewhat plodding satire on the current hysteria surrounding the late, and not very great, Jimmy Savile was no sooner written and posted when I began my usual trawl through my favourite blogs beginning, of course, with the redoubtable Anna Raccoon who is in the process of telling her life story. Apparently the corner-stone of this whole Savile broohaha emanated from the Newsnight story in which some former inmates of an approved school for girls in Staines claimed that Savile, with the connivance of the lady who ran the establishment, had sexually assaulted them. Ms. Raccoon was actually a resident of this school herself at that time and her views are well worth reading. They can be summed up in her own words, thus:
Abuse victims should be heard. They should be listened to intently. By the same token, those accused of such heinous crimes should be so accused by tested evidence, not newspaper circuses. This shouldn’t be a subject to push up newspaper circulation, nor for a Punch and Judy show between branches of the political media – the damage done by sexual abuse is too profound for that. What is happening, with a – shall we call it polite disbelief – in some quarters, that not all the ’400 victims who have come forward’ are entirely motivated by a desire for the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, does a disservice to every genuine case.
I’m not afraid of the truth, I have nothing to fear from it. If other girls were cowering behind bedroom doors in 1965 and I failed to notice, nor even hear mention of the man’s name, let alone meet him – well then, after eating my Raccoon tail, I shall take myself off for counseling; I would obviously have a profound case of ‘false memory syndrome’.
I have absolutely no knowledge of any of it but her words add to my general unease which always arises when I see a mob in full pursuit!