"You're an absolute shower" was the catchphrase of the ineffable Terry Thomas and how very applicable it is to the bunch of second-hand car dealers former members of the General Staff who were caught out by The Sunday Times flogging their influence in the government and the Ministry of Defence to the highest bidder - in this case a 'supposed' South Korean company selling drones.
Lord Dannatt said last night that the bogus lobbyists offered to pay him a monthly fee of £8,000 if he would approach senior figures in the MoD on behalf of the company. The peer said he did not agree to accept any money, however he told the undercover reporters from the Sunday Times that it might be possible to make an “indirect approach” to senior figures at the department.
So far as I can tell, none of them told the fake lobbyists to jump in their sampan and 'Foxtrot Oscar' back to Korea, or, perhaps more politely, simply write out the telephone number of the Ministry of Defence and hand it to them. It isn't just the greed that practically dribbles out of the corners of their mouths but their dim, dumb naïveté in failing to spot, or even suspect, the trick being played on them. Cupidity and stupidity all wrapped up in fancy uniforms and smothered in bullshit about comradeship and duty.
"What an absolute shower!"
I think the journalists already know who is likely to fall for these tricks, in other words their cupidity and stupidity is already common knowledge in certain circles. Makes you wonder how they rose to such a level of seniority.
Posted by: A K Haart | Tuesday, 16 October 2012 at 11:14
In the army, AK, it's known as arse-licking by numbers!
Posted by: David Duff | Tuesday, 16 October 2012 at 13:06
As a junior pen pusher I was taught early on to make sure you 'had the black' on senior managers - it might come in handy some day. I am pretty sure these chaps 'have the black' much higher up and will prove to be bombproof. Otherwise I look forward to the full Dreyfus treatment (one can hope).
Posted by: rogerh | Tuesday, 16 October 2012 at 13:33
"Makes you wonder how they rose to such a level of seniority."
As I've remarked before on this thing; it was commonly believed in the RAF that people promoted above Wing Commander had their brains removed.
It was probably at a much lower rank in the Army.
Posted by: backofanenvelope | Tuesday, 16 October 2012 at 14:15
For further enlightenment, reading Richard North's latest effort. Especially the letter from the American colonel.
Posted by: backofanenvelope | Tuesday, 16 October 2012 at 14:27
It - hope - springs eternal, so I understand, Roger, but I am not holding my breath.
"It was probably at a much lower rank in the Army".
It was, 'Envelope', it began at sergeant, that is, one rank *above* that which I attained over, er, well, nine years actually! I have saved the American letter to read at a later date.
Posted by: David Duff | Tuesday, 16 October 2012 at 15:13
To paraphrase Michael Z Williamson in 'Better To Beg Forgiveness':
I thought about becoming an officer. I attended the selection course and breezed through it. The highest scores they'd ever seen, apparently. It all fell apart at the interview though. They found out that I had a personal 'issue' which forever made me ineligible - my parents were married!
Posted by: Able | Tuesday, 16 October 2012 at 19:09
I remember my selection course which I also failed. At one interview with a very senior officer he asked me, in turn: Do you go to church? Do you pray? Do you believe in God? To all of which I answered no but after the last one I did point out as politely as I could that I was looking for a commission in the Parachute Rehiment, not the Chaplain's Department! (That might not have failed me because I was pretty rubbish at everything.)
Posted by: David Duff | Tuesday, 16 October 2012 at 19:40
Your mistake was to be honest.
Posted by: backofanenvelope | Wednesday, 17 October 2012 at 09:12
Actually, D, our brave boys and girls fight - and sometimes die - for Her Maj.
Quite a different matter. There are always tossers in the General Staffs, somewhere.
Posted by: Andrew Duffin | Wednesday, 17 October 2012 at 12:33
David. It happens in all countries. Is it better that we have experts in war advising or politicians!
Posted by: Jimmy Glesga | Thursday, 18 October 2012 at 01:58
'Envelope', possibly but I began to think I was in the wrong room!
Andrew, you are entirely right, but please forgive my Blog-standard hyperbole.
Jimmy, I hear what you say but first we need to find some experts in war!
Posted by: David Duff | Thursday, 18 October 2012 at 09:05
David. Maybe 'personal experience in war' would have been better. As my old Da used to say the shit hit the fan for a while then it was calm and we eat bully beef,pom and hardtack bikkies. Then it started all over again. Maybe he meant the smell especially with the diet.
Posted by: Jimmy Glesga | Saturday, 20 October 2012 at 19:40