For the purposes of this particular post I am adopting my 'Senior-Officer-Addressing-the Troops' voice, so you will all sit to attention and take notes where necessary! There are local elections approaching this week which are, of course, of no interest to anyone outside the political circus. Men and women of sound mind would normally shrug and continue on their way to the pub where they will quickly become of un-sound mind! However, on this occasion, your orders have been changed. On Thursday you will move in an orderly body towards your nearest polling station and once in position you will proceed to mark a large 'X' next to the name of the UKIP candidate. He, of course, will be a bit of a mouth-foaming loony but he has one great advantage - he is not a faux-Tory - (there are virtually no real Tories to be found anywhere these days.) If you lack a UKIP candidate, feel free to use your iniative and vote for any non-faux-Tory candidate provided only that they are neither Labour nor Lib-Dem. The object of the exercise is simple, it is absolutely necessary to send a huge message to 'Dim Dave', so huge that even he will notice it, to the effect that he has proved to be in most respects utterly useless. This will be your last chance before the next general election so make the most of it! Right, carry on!