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Tuesday, 11 July 2017

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To put things in context:

https://headrambles.com/2017/07/11/anna-raccoon-bench-marks/

Keep the British End Up Duffers old chap.

Best of British.

All will be well. Don't bite too hard on that leather strap though, the old choppers may not be what they were.

Just remember that you have to avoid violent movement for a few weeks. Put the wife on top and just lie back and enjoy.

Gentlemen, thanks to you all, even if the report on Anna Raccoon's incredible stamina puts a wimp like me to shame.

Best of luck, pain definitely interferes with the ability to focus as I have learned all too well. I will need you to be sharp if I am to explain to you why you are wrong about nearly everything.

Bonne Chance.

You might ask for a colonoscopy as long as you're anesthetized. Maybe they'll find what keeps you so nettled.

Duffers as was only too predictable bob and our dear friend peterg are holding out for you to be allowed to die with dignity and not be allowed to to live.

So fuck them and come back soon, all guns blazing!

I don't think anybody said that Cuffleyburgers. That would be your own invention. And I also don't think anyone anywhere is much at risk of being left to die with dignity because they have a hernia. I happen to be one of those hardy socialists who think everyone deserves health care.

David I told you your surgery would be this week! I made a phone call but don't let that get out, you know how word travels on the web! If you must bite the strap-I hope it is new leather! Good luck!

Robert

Stiff upper lip and all that, old boy!

David,

If anyone asks whether you have any questions before they put you under, ask if the surgeon would mind taking a breathalyzer test before he asks for the scalpel. :)

Best wishes,
Henry

David

Get well soon!

Hank

Good luck Duffers.

If you get a choice of leather ask for a fine kid as it is much kinder on the choppers.

Good luck, I am sending metaphorical grapes.

I'm the kind of visitor who will metaphorically nibble on the metaphorical grapes. Have fun and don't let them excise the old acid!

DD,

Just saw this, and by now it's all over but the shouting (and groaning, and wailing, gnashing of teeth, etc).

I hope everything went well, and that by now you are floating on a feathery pillow of palliative medicaments.

Get well soon!

- MP

There, the old windbag is stitched up and back a la maison, grumpy as you like.

And now the punchline: The surgeon and anaesthetist were both Polish - so a bloody good job it wasn't after 1st April 2019 or they'd be back home and he'd still be waiting in the queue!

I couldn't help but crack a smile when the two of them introduced themselves, and enjoyed watching the Gaffer try to avoid my smirk! But I restrained myself from blurting out: "You know he voted Brexit don't you?"

Who knows what revenge surgery might have happened "down there": -


There was a Gaffer from Somerset,
Who had a hernia and voted for Brexit,
The doctor was Polish,
And feeling quite churlish,
So the Gaffer is now Gafferette!

SoD

Very good news, indeed, Lawrence. Thanks for letting all of us know.

SoD,

There's a Polish joke (or two) in there somewhere, but I'll let sleeping dogs lie, as it were ...

Tell the Gaffer some of us are eager for his trademark grumpiness to resume.

Bring it, David!

Thanks SoD!

Thank you for the update SoD.

I'm glad you were amused by the polish plumbers, and I hope they didn't forget any tools inside him.

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