What is the most boring-snoring sport? I asked myself, and you, that question because the news broke overnight that there is a new world champion in the sport of, er, well, darts, actually - do wake up at the back there! Unfortunately, whilst pondering this intensely difficult subject this afternoon, I fell asleep! Certainly darts would be a contender but once you start to think about it there are so many others. I apologise to my American friends when I suggest as a real snore-fest what they are pleased to call 'American football'. This is a game in which, it appears to me, that more time is spent not playing than actually playing! Of course, they would probably counter that by suggesting test match cricket which can last up to five days but I would respond by telling them test match cricket was actually designed to be boring although I can't think why!
Bowls is another tedious sport but again that was designed to be tedious because it is simply an excuse to sit by an immaculate lawn set inside beautiful gardens. Golf, too, can have a soporific effect but just sometimes great golfers can pull off tricky shots brilliantly and the applause will wake you up. Virtually all of athletics is utterly boring because you just know that really it's a competition between drug companies.
There is, of course, only one sport that remains intensely exciting, especially to elderly gents like me, and that is Brazilian Ladies Volley Ball but, dammit, it hardly ever features on my 'telly'!