As I pointed out in a post below, 'Jockland' is fast becoming a luxury we can ill afford. Frankly, the same goes for 'Oop North' populated as it is by millions who hang from the government teat. I would like to suggest a radical idea, if only to prove that even an unreconstructed old re-actionary like me can come up with some lateral thinking.
I suggest that we should break up the United Kingdom. Let the Jocks and the Taffs go their separate ways, but also, we should allow the same privilege to the 'Yorkies', my generic title for anyone who lives North of the M42. They could become the People's Republic of ... er, well, no doubt they would fall into a frenzy of discord over the name, to say nothing of deciding which city should be the capital. Birmingham? Manchester? Leeds? What fun we should all have watching them squabble.
In the meantime, the Kingdom of South Britain would be established and the crown offered to her Majesty. Parliament would consist of approximately 80 members. All existing local authorities would be scrapped and the area divided into the SW, NW, NE, SE, Home counties and London itself. Everything possible would be privatised including, indeed, especially, health and education. Incidentally, privatised education would receive government subsidies for every child who passes independent exams in the modern equivalent of the three 'Rs', that is, any skills that would be useful in a 21st century economy. All unnecessary regulations governing the City of London would be abolished and a single tax rate would be imposed. The area surrounding the Thames estuary would be turned into a Free Port prior to the eventual development of the whole country into one huge low-tax area.
The wealth creation would be incredible as South Britain became a European Hong Kong. Of course, and whilst stifling our cheers out of politeness, we would leave the EU. We would also have to relinquish our useless seat on the (non) security council of that gang of thieves known misleadingly as the United Nations - so no loss there, then! Our armed forces would change radically. There would be no attempt made to train them for invasion, or so-called 'peace-keeping' duties. Instead, the army would become a small and purely defence force. The navy and air force would be armed with ICBMs and the very latest in defence systems to protect us against any incoming missiles aimed at us. Our foreign policy would be to snuggle as closely as we can to Uncle Sam whilst pointing out that in our new circumstances we would not be able to provide anything except moral support.
Then, we should be able to ... eh? What? Oh, thank you, nurse, is it teatime already? I must have dozed off.
Brum. North of the M42. Eh?
Posted by: dearieme | Friday, 25 May 2007 at 20:16
According to my map it's north of half of the M42 and north west of the remainder. Mind you, I find everything a little hazy north of the M4!
Posted by: David Duff | Friday, 25 May 2007 at 23:09
I think secession for many and various parts of the UK is a good idea. It would, I suspect, be rather good for us "oop north". Going it alone might perhaps force us to wean ourselves off the teats of the southern cow, as it were. There is even the possibility that local culture could revive in what are at present cultural wastelands.
Posted by: Deogolwulf | Saturday, 26 May 2007 at 11:57
Deogolwulf, I have taken your point in a further post up above.
Posted by: David Duff | Saturday, 26 May 2007 at 14:58
Problem solved, maestro. For some reason I thought you meant the M23. Apologies.
Posted by: dearieme | Sunday, 27 May 2007 at 23:02
No apologies needed, 'Dearieme', but you really should take more water with it! The M23 runs due south to Brighton. Perhaps you meant the M25. I can't help thinking that your annual, seaside holiday must be something of an adventure, with the kids all playing 'Guess where Daddy's taking us today?'
Posted by: David Duff | Monday, 28 May 2007 at 08:52