DUFF & NONSENSE!: Your 'Rough Guide' to the Chancellor's statement

Your 'Rough Guide' to the Chancellor's statement

If, like me, you are probably going to be bewitched, bothered and bewildered by all the financial/economic gobbledegook about to be spewed forth in the House of Commons today, here is a 'Rough Guide' to help you cling to your sanity.

First, hold this thought firmly in your mind at all times, the proposals the Chancellor will put before you will be firmly aimed at one thing, and one thing only, securing a Labour win at the next election (which is likely to occur much sooner than expected), not the good health of the British economy which will go its own sweet way for good or ill irrespective of any governmental fiddling (I use the word advisedly) around that is proposed today.

Second, irrespective of all the soothing words, there will be pain! It will either be today, or tomorrow, or more likely over the next several years, but pain there undoubtedly will be. The more that 'Mad Jock Broon' borrows, the greater and longer and more intense will be the pain.

Third, if he gives you a contribution from the national 'poor box' today, don't spend it, because tomorrow he will want it back with interest!

Fourth, virtually all the money borrowed and spent by the government will either be totally wasted, or carry with it unbelievably huge costs.

Fifth, and finally, there is only one small chance of good news and that, if it comes, will emanate from the opposition, if they can summon up the courage to damn with all their strength this whole crazy, casino-caper gamble on borrowed money. It may not go down well with the electorate and if 'Broon' cuts and runs early they might lose the next election, but they will have told the truth and eventually that virtue will, after the cataclysm, be repaid.

Oh, sorry, one more thing, Gordon Brown is an inveterate and proven liar, so cling to that thought, too!

Posted by David & Son of Duff | Permalink