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Monday, 15 June 2009


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And as if that poor tyke in Germany that got strick by that rock from the heavens weren't enough:

"Damn Oprah!"

"Watcha talkin' 'bout Cuz?"


"Well Cuz, I did mention the Green Plan - then our Guantanamo Plan to locate some bad guys to Bermuda midst givin' 'em $100K. Al? You know what happened?"

"Frankly Oprah, no."

"Well eighty-five percent of the working class families in Detroit called in to admit they were all al-Q too. We'll have a huge problem if the politicians turn on their TV's."

"Well Oprah, what's the Phase Two Plan?"

"Eh Al? You got a house down in Bermuda too don'cha?"

"Yeah Oprah, actually three, but one is the one me and Tipper run the global warming thing out of - which, if you'll recall - since ya promised to sign that anti-tobacco nonsense (FYI-Al Gore's fortune to run for the Senate in the first place came from tobacco interests) Oprah, I'll be forced to run Global Warming Central out of the basement."

"Al? It's not on Monserrat. I mean your Bermudan properties?"

"No Oprah."

"Well then Al, we'll only take up the upper three floors. A hunerd K?" Sheeit. Gordie B. might want the sixth floor but then he's dueling with that Duffouse feller and Duff'll probably finace his boatride off the Emerald Isle. See where I'm goin' Al?"

"Actually no, all I ever did was run Liggett Tobacco, spent some time in the Senate then spent some time in litigation with the Florida Supreme Court. Then I did that inconvenient crap. Oprah? You know this, what're you asking?"

"Well Al, there's gold in them thar hills. Bermuda I mean. Got it all set up."

"Oprah? I'm not following it."

"Al, it's simple. Duff is gonna send Gordie packing and he'll need a landing spot. Bermuda is UK, I've got the 100K arranged for moving expenses and it's a tax haven, nuff said?"

"Well Oprah, I guess. But what about Global Warming?"

"Al... make friends with the Rastafarians."


It's the way you tell 'em, 'JK'!

Shhh, I'm simply recording. I may make errors in transcribing.

You did I'm certain notice my one little misspelling, "Duff'll probably finace his boatride"?

I figured David, that since (at least in the US) no politician ever writes a damn thing - aside from financial disclosure forms - that'd get you (personally) out of the espence of having to pay for the boat-ride. Let the aides do it - ah Monica, where are you when I'm single?

No. Don't answer that. I'm 40 pounds lighter.

Illustrating - an Arkansas politician to be fair & a Demo:

"U.S. Rep. Marion Berry has underestimated the value of a Washington home on required financial disclosure forms by, oh, a half-million or so. He seems to be reporting cost of the Capitol Hill rowhouse (which he apparently rents out) -- $369,000 -- rather than the required current market value of $947,000. Honest mistake, his staff says."

(Hard to figure why you'd intentionally underreport. With Google mapping.)

Now David I can understand how I might get the UK version of "WTF?" But heck, I don't know what "MP" actually stands for.

"Minister" - something or another? If that'd be the case, then it'd also explain why all the religious nut-jobs have tons of ammunition replacing Grandma's preserves over here.


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