I have just read the following headline on the BBC site but I am too angry to bother to read the background to it:
German men are 'world's worst lovers' with English men in second place
Listen, Hans, me old mate, we've been the worst lovers in the world for absolute yonks, and proud of it, too! It was the fact that our wives couldn't stand the pounding for the 10 or so seconds a week we set aside for 'that sort of thing' that allowed us to go out and build an empire. And as for the BBC publishing such a vile calumny - second best indeed - well, it's just one more reason to privatise the whole damned thing!
10 seconds a week? Take it from one who knows, the best way to boost your libido is to buy a treadmill. And don't just let it sit there. Make sure your wife uses it every day. It does wonders for you sagging sex drive.
Posted by: Dom | Wednesday, 30 September 2009 at 17:18
What do you mean "sagging sex drive"? I always reckoned 10 secs a week was pretty good going! And back in the days when I had to indulge in that sort of thing, if I had used a treadmill I would have been down to 10 seconds a month.
But just a moment! Am I missing something here? I mean, entre nous, Dom, nobody reads this rubbish on D&N so your secret is safe with me, is there something, you know, a bit, er, esoteric that can be performed on a treadmill? I've tried to imagine it but I can't quite work it out. I suspect that with my ineptitude I'd end up with a broken leg.
Posted by: David Duff | Wednesday, 30 September 2009 at 18:05
I can see I'm needed for translator duty David, first if the Huns are "the worst" and you folks are second - doesn't that mean limeys are the second worst?
Of course we Southern US males do our part - at least our wimmenfolk do:
http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20301647,00.html
And,I don't think it's a treadmill you need - it's a better reading list:
http://christiannymphos.org/
Posted by: JK | Wednesday, 30 September 2009 at 19:44
Exactly, 'JK', and we should be the first worst!
As for your fist link, I can only mutter, 'only in Arkansas'!
As for the second, my hand trembled over the mouse as I clicked. Where do you find them?
Posted by: David Duff | Wednesday, 30 September 2009 at 21:07
The Nymphos or the websites?
Posted by: JK | Thursday, 01 October 2009 at 01:26
Yet again, the damned Germans get there before us.
First they came for the sun beds...
Posted by: North Northwester | Thursday, 01 October 2009 at 08:40
The websites, you rascal, 'JK'!
Quite right, 'NNW', and then it's Poland!
Posted by: David Duff | Thursday, 01 October 2009 at 17:21
OK...... here we go again......on the first link JK listed .....just because some Jack Ass in Arkansas managed to have 19 babies doesn't make him a good lover... just potent...... and for all we know he only lasted 5 seconds..... about all we know for sure is his wife doesn't swallow!!!!!!
Now JK...If you looking for a Christian Nympho....... I can join a church for you...... LMAO!!!!!
Posted by: Renee | Sunday, 04 October 2009 at 20:28
5 secs! So, not too bad then, really!
(By the way, what does 'LMAO' mean?)
Posted by: David Duff | Sunday, 04 October 2009 at 20:54
LMAO..... is Laughing my Ass off.
Posted by: Renee | Sunday, 04 October 2009 at 22:13
Never a day goes by without my learning something new!
Posted by: David Duff | Sunday, 04 October 2009 at 23:02