Mr. Chris 'my God what a man, he can straighten lesbians' Huhne MP is looking distinctly bent today following the revelations by those unscrupulous, dandruff-ridden rodents from The Daily Mail. Obviously they have suborned/bought/hacked (who knows?) the person said to have taken the penalty points when 'the lesbian-straightener' was caught rushing through Essex at over the speed limit, possibly on his way to a laying-on of hands to straighten out some other poor, deluded sister of Lesbos who needed to be shown the true way! Some snidey, Labourite MP who probably couldn't straighten a paper clip has snitched to the Essex 'plod' who, even as I write, are 'proceeding in a westerly direction prior to conducting an investigation'. The Mail, needless to say, is positively drooling and dribbling with expectation that Huhne might have to do time at Her Maj's pleasure, in which case he could come out in need of a bit of straightening, himself! In the meantime, I have it on very good authority that 'Goody-Two-Shoes' Clegg is lying on his sitting-room floor drumming his heels on the floor, clutching his sides and biting on a piece of carpet to stop his howls of laughter disturbing the neighbours. It's all fraternity, you know, in this political game!
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