My apologies to Mr. Sondheim for not only misappropriating his famous song but defiling it with a rude word! It is, of course, part of the mission statement of this blog to be constantly as rude as possible about politicians but even my heart softens when, as they do regularly, they slap on the grease paint, the orange wig, the red nose, the baggy pants and the big boots and proceed to drop buckets of water over themselves as they execute the latest in prat-falls. It really does add to the gaiety of the nation. Today we can all sit back and enjoy the frantic antics of not one, not two, but three political clowns.
First up we have Mr. Paul Flowers, a Labour party politician and Methodist minister, a man with a deviant sexual history going back thirty years (no sniggering!) but which both the Methodist church and teh Labour party were prepared to, er, forgive and forget - very Christian and comradely of them, I'm sure. This fat plonker wormed his way up the Labour party ladder to the very top of the Co-operative Bank which went on to lend the Labour party zillions which, of course, came from the deposits and savings of those very self-same "hardworking families" that Labour never stops prating about. As it stands at the moment, with the unions refusing to give Labour any more money until 'Ed Milipede' crawls off their backs, there is very little chance of Labour being able to repay the loans. So much for the trusting little people - suckers!
For my second big, fat clown we need to go 'over there' but not straight 'over there', we need to steer a bit north to a country, I must admit, I always thought was amongst the most boring in the world, Canada. I refer, of course, to Mayor (look, I won't have any sniggering!) Rob Ford of Ontario. This monumentally fat clown has been caught out as an alcoholic, cocaine-snorting nutcase. His City council has stripped him of most of his powers but they cannot remove him as mayor - that is for the citizens of Ontario to decide at the next election and if they have a sense of humour which they must need in the frozen wastes of Canada they will re-elect him with a huge majority so that they can watch this 'raging bull' of a man exact his cocaine-fuelled vengeance on his fellow councillors. Well, as entertainment it beats ice-hockey!
The third clown is the biggest of the lot, not physically because he is what my old mother would have called a "skinny-malinky long-legs and umbrella feet"! Yes, you've guessed, I refer of course, to Mr. President 'Goofball' himself! Even for a verbal gusher like me it is now impossible - my handy Thesaurus has burst into flames! - to find the right words to describe the enormity of this 'Obamacare' disaster. With malice afore-thought, plus some mega-stupidity, this clown of a president, who makes 'Dubya' look as brainy as Freeman Dyson, aided and abetted by the 'Dimocrat' party has attacked the vast majority of Americans in their most sensitive areas - their health insurance and their wallets. But - and it's a fairly hefty 'but' - President 'Goofball' has achieved one thing hitherto thought impossible - he makes 'Dim Dave' look, well, quite bright, actually!
Lay off Canada, not the idiot mayor of Toronto, I am residing there at the moment and I find them a decent enough lot and not in the least bit boring. I am in the French speaking part and they are way better then their European cousins where I also lived for some time as well. I accept that the weather is a bit parky at this time of the year and a bit hot and humid at other times. If last year is anything to go by snow will arrive in abundance soon and will lay thick and even for many months but life will carry on as if it does not exist (somebody pointed out that it was because it was the right type of snow unlike that which falls in the UK from time time, quite frequently in winter these days I am reliably informed).
Posted by: Antisthenes | Tuesday, 19 November 2013 at 21:16
You're quite right, Antisthenes, especially as rumour has it that I'm half Canadian! And it's always the wrong sort of snow in England, at least down here in the south, because it's always more than half a millimetre thick and thereby reduces everything to chaos. It has almost become a national sport!
Posted by: David Duff | Tuesday, 19 November 2013 at 21:26