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Monday, 23 December 2013


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Not bad.

Anyway, further to Xmas tuck - this morning my wife counted: we had 14 different cheeses in the house. By this arvo we had 11, since one of the Cheddars, the Gorgonzola and the St Paulin had all vanished. Must have been those bloody elves.

'Elves'! Yessir, per'aps when you've wiped your lips you could breathe into this bag . . .

Hmmmm. I had thought WE were ahead of you lot but it appears that Christmas comes earlier in Scotland.
Duff, DM, JK, et al, enjoy all the fruits that this season brings and get lots of rest.
Next year's going to be a doozy, I think.
Merry Christmas from Down Under.

Thank you, Miss, but please, Miss, can we have our cricket team back?

We've sent a swan back for a start. He can start a-swimming and the rest will follow in due course.

And now the Chinaman has chipped in.
As a professional musician his advice is that you should seek singing lessons for the Barmy Army - they are out of tune and flat to boot!
And he means it in the nicest way, dears.

No, no, you can keep Swann, he's wetter than his feathered namesakes! As for the barmy army, you can keep them, too, they're clinically insane! Well, who would spend all that money when back home it's the Panto Season at a fraction of the price!

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