I haven't indulged in a Sunday Rumble for a while and as I have a few household tasks to execute today it will suit me to just pop up the stairs from time to time and, as it were, 'rumble' (or perhaps 'grumble' might be more accurate) rather than compose one of my usual elegant, thoughtful and carefully composed posts - and don't think I didn't hear that!
'And then they came for the generals': And about bloody time, too! According to The Telegraph, there are plans afoot to cut about a third of the colonels, brigadiers and generals in the army. Needless to say, the chances are that they will cut the wrong third by aiming at the brightest and the best, or 'the awkward squad', as original thinkers are usually known. However, as there are also plans to cut another 20,000 soldiers, then it may not matter much because it is now clear that the British army has reverted to being solely a home defence force. And about bloody time, too!
And here's why the generals must go: My pal and regular commenter, Richard, tipped me off a few days ago that there was a book coming out written by a general who had served in that most dangerous of environments - the Ministry of Defence! The book is now published and was reviewed in The Spectator:
High Command: British Military Leadership in the Iraq and Afghanistan Wars by Christopher L. Elliott Hurst
In essence, I gather (I haven't read the book yet), he suggests that in future our military chiefs should be less docile and instead stand up to the daft notions of politicians and senior civil servants. In other words, "No, minister" not "Yes, minister"!
'Mamade' should be renamed: Probably most of you MCPs have never heard of 'Mamade' but, alas, this broken-backed, domestic wimp has been forced to learn the hardway.
On the grounds that I am far and away the main consumer of marmalade in this house it was decided by the 'Central Committee' that I should make the bloody stuff! There was no way in which I could, so to speak, start the process from scratch with a sack of oranges so I take the relatively easy way out and use tins of 'Mamade'. It's all a bit of a bore because you have stand around for ages constantly stirring the mixture but, so long as you get the timing right - yes, 'as in sex and drumming'! - the end result is rather good. Of course, the world is full of as many marmalade bores as there are wine bores and dry martini - oooooops! - bores. They would sneer at the ultra sweetness of Mamade - 4lbs of sugar! - and the fact that it doesn't have orange peel an inch thick but I don't care - I love it and this morning, without being nagged, I made another batch. God I'm good!
The Greeks still don't get it: Since my visit last year to the island of Rhodes my liking for Greeks has risen to devotion! Even so, they all seem to be as thick as the pillars of the Acropolis! Peter Oborne in The Telegraph points out that the favourite in today's election, the Syriza party, makes our 'Kipper' party look rather sensible. The Syriza leader is simply promising the Greek people anything and everything even if they are all contradictory. Should he win, he and his fellow Greeks will almost certainly get nothing except more hardship and misery. At that point we, and the Greeks, will find out if he means what he says about pulling out of the EU. Mind you, one can understand his loony stance because acording to all reports, whilst the Greeks loathe the EU set-up and over-rule, in effect, by Germany - they love the euro! Hardly any of them, bar one tiny Left-wing party, are in favour of ditching the euro and returning to the drachma. And that, of course, is their only real way of climbing out of the disaster they find themselves in.
'Greater love hath no man ...': Than that he give up his chance to watch episodes 5 and 6 of "Spiral", featuring the two sexiest women on television, so that his wife can watch yet another boring-snoring Foyle's War story. But that's what I did last night so this afternoon I'm off downstairs to catch up, courtesy of my 'do-flicker-recording-thingie', assuming I can get it to work!
A near catastrophe: So, off I tootled downstairs, settled myself into my armchair, clicked around with my 'do-flicker-thingie' and then - SHLOCK-HORROR! - discovered that I had failed to record 'Spiral'. How could I have been so lax - well, obviously it was all the Memsahib's fault, I'm not exactly sure how but it must have been! Fortunately for her, before my wailing and sobbing reached too much of a crescendo, she quietly mentioned something called i-player - no, me neither. But with a few helpful hints from her I discovered that you can replay any missed TV items on your computer screen - 'waddya mean ya noo already'! Nobody told me. Anyway, fortunately I possess a larger than normal computer screen so I was able to watch my two episodes very clearly and comfortably up here in my garret. I may never descend to the servants' quarters on the lower floors ever again - er, well, except at meal times, of course!
No more rumbles.
It would be interesting to know how many top civil servants are to get the chop!
Posted by: Backofanevelope | Sunday, 25 January 2015 at 10:28
Somewhere between nil and none is my rough estimation!
Posted by: David Duff | Sunday, 25 January 2015 at 11:07
Four pounds of sugar?
Posted by: Whitewall | Sunday, 25 January 2015 at 14:20
Not an ounce more not an ounce less! You can feel your arteries slamming shut with every mouthful - yummy!
Posted by: David Duff | Sunday, 25 January 2015 at 16:34
Whew! David you are truly a stout fellow!
Posted by: Whitewall | Sunday, 25 January 2015 at 16:52
It is better to fight your enemy on their territory than on your own. The cuts to our army is madness.
Posted by: jimmy glesga | Sunday, 25 January 2015 at 18:56
Well, I certainly have a rumble and a grumble.
I've been passed over for daming once again and our wanker of a Prime Minister appears to have given MY gong to your Phil!
What the f#%k's going on here?
Filthy Phil has done absolutely nothing for Australia ...... might have helped the dwindling population of New Zealand, or so I'm told, but that's got nothing to do with me and my honours.
I would make an official objection to our Governor General but he doesn't seem to be in the country for Australia Day. He's gone to Saudi Arabia to wave bye bye to some rich old coot who's gone to find out how the virgin supply is in paradise. Good luck with that one, boss.
I am developing a theory that maybe I have to wait for an existing dame to drop off the perch, as it were, and then it will be my turn.
Dame Edna is looking a bit shaky so I'll keep my eye on her.
And so, my Oz Day is off to a bad start but I'll do my best to carry on.
Four pounds of sugar!! Alors!
Posted by: Andra | Sunday, 25 January 2015 at 21:43
You don't make it from scratch!?!! My goodness, what a cheat. My mum not only makes marmalade from scratch with a.....zest...ha ha and zeal one normally reserves for fighting fires or cleaning the house before the in-laws arrive, she also makes vast quantities of the stuff. We now have a marmalade cellar, where you can descend to the dusty jars and admire such relics as "Dark Seville 1977" or "Not Quite Enough Sugar 2003". She also makes jam and sloe gin, unless it's a particularly good damson year, in which we get Damson gin as well.
Posted by: Mayfly | Monday, 26 January 2015 at 08:47
Beware bitterness, Andra, it will give you lines!
"Not Quite Enough Sugar 2003", Mayfly! Bin it instantly!
Posted by: David Duff | Monday, 26 January 2015 at 10:28