08.26 hrs:
Yes, apparently He is displeased because we haven't been paying our energy bills on time and so sometime this morning 'the lights are going out all over England - will we see them lit again in our lifetimes'? Enough of this sub-Lord Grey nonsense, there is to be a solar eclipse this morning and your brave frontline reporter, instead of burying his head under the duvet, will bring you all the latest news as it occurs - er, unless I blink and miss it!
09.04 hrs:
No change - heh! - promises, promises . . .
09.45 hrs:
"Is that all there is?" (Sorry, more Peggy Lee!) Well, the earth didn't move for me nor for the 'Memsahib', although she added that it never did - what can she mean? Anyway, I could discern no change in the light whatsoever. And I was looking forward to a sudden blackout with my elderly neighbours tripping over their furniture, cars skidding and crashing on the main road because they failed to put their lights on and the lady vicar shedding her clothes in the churchyard and converting to paganism. Instead of relying on all those astronomy science swots the media should have turned to the astrologers, far more accurate they'd be! Anyway, we'll wait and see if there are any late effects . . .
15.53 hrs:
Well, the day just got brighter and lighter as time went on. What a con! If that's the best the 'Master of the Universe' can do then I shall begin to harbour doubts!
Oh, I dunno. Had to put my headlights on up here in North Derbys, north of 53 degrees, and according to the late Mr. Kipling There is no Law' of God nor Man runs North of the '53.'
Posted by: Oswald Thake | Friday, 20 March 2015 at 10:44
What no virgins to chuck in a volcano? That's what one does at an eclipse isn't it.
The Great Spirit probably abandoned the eclipse when he/she/it realised you hadn't got the requisite virgin.
I was going to ask about the lady vicar but that would probably be indelicate.
OK Back to the naughty corner.
Posted by: AussieD | Friday, 20 March 2015 at 11:41
Heh, typical, you Northerners nick all the good things!
AussieD - virgins in Britain in this 21st century? Only below the age of 10 and with all the paedos we keep hearing about we can't be too sure about them, either!
Posted by: David Duff | Friday, 20 March 2015 at 13:52
It was a partial eclipse in the UK so no blackout plus it was cloudy in most of it so hardly any light was getting in anyway. I watched it and was a tad disappointed. Still, better than working.
Posted by: Lord T | Friday, 20 March 2015 at 15:35
AussieD. Virgins are at a premium due to high demand in the Middle East. More required due to martyrdom in Yemen.
Posted by: jimmy glesga | Friday, 20 March 2015 at 17:03
We'd planned a march of the virgins for JK's birthday today but one was sick and the other refused to march alone.
Never mind.
Better luck next year.
Posted by: Andra | Friday, 20 March 2015 at 19:13
We had a good view of it here in Derbyshire. No lady vicars shedding their clothes though, which is a blessing.
Posted by: Uncle Mort | Friday, 20 March 2015 at 21:56
'Northerner?' East Midlander, please! I'm a proud 'woolly-back' from God's own county.
Posted by: Oswald Thake | Saturday, 21 March 2015 at 11:48
Sorry, Oswald, but, darling, you're north of the M4 and that's all it takes!
Posted by: David Duff | Monday, 23 March 2015 at 09:04