Please note the change of title: Yes, I'm afraid that 'Sunday Rumble', my previous title for this fairly regular spot, simply does not do justice to my hissy-fit rage this morning. Obviously a conspiracy has been hatched with the aim of reducing me to a foam-flecked, ranting maniac - and don't think I didn't hear that! First of all, last night there was . . .
Strictly Come Shrieking: Can anyone explain to me why it is necessary for the ladies, both audience and participants, in Strictly Come Dancing, to SHRIEEEEK constantly, never-endingly, without pause, indeed, without reason? In fact, the only time they cease to shriek, or at least reduce the volume somewhat, is when a couple are 'dancing'. I suppose I shouldn't complain because whilst I used to enjoy the programme in its early days when they attempted to execute proper dancing, now I hate it and as soon as the shrieking starts, roughly 0.07 seconds after the start, I make my excuses and leave it to the 'Memsahib' who, I can only assume is going deaf. Well, she never pays any attention to my occasional requests either!
But the D&N archivist cheered me up: Yes, dear old 'JK' has been rooting around in the D&N cellar searching for something or other and in the course of it there was a reference to my absolutely favourite 'cheer up' YouTube. I've linked to it before but it's worth another visit because it's witty and fun - and Russian! Yeeeees, quite!
https://www.youtube.com/embed/KgoapkOo4vg?rel=0
Mind you, I hope that by now the husband has stopped his wife from SHRIEEEKING!
But then the Bishops ruined everything: What is it about C of E bishops that makes them into such smug, useless and unbelievably hypocritical tosspots? Joining the choir chanting the old responses to - 'Something must be done' - they have insisted that the government must take in tens of thousands more immigrants. And where, exactly and precisely, m'Lord Bishop, do you suggest we put them? Are you by any chance offering any of those hundreds of empty, unused churches or church properties you own. Nah, didn't think so! So now I'm back into foaming-mode again!
Well, this battle really was 'Shakespearean': The other day, in a fanciful mood, I broke the battle of Waterloo down into five 'Shakespearean' acts. Today, I am obliged to Mr. Josh Gelernter of the NRO for reminding me that next weekend marks the 600th anniversary of a battle that was to become the most famous 'Shakespearean' battle of them all - Henry V.
Now entertain conjecture of a time
When creeping murmur and the poring dark
Fills the wide vessel of the universe.
I urge you all to have a read of Mr. Gelernter's essay, it is an excellent summary of a most extraordinary battle:
I have been told that "shrieking" is what some women do naturally because--they claim--their husbands can't seem to hear them. Personally, I have perfect husband hearing and am never exposed to such noise. Why just this morning Mrs. WW was going on about something...not sure what, but it struck a major nerve with me. That would be the nerve that triggers my "time to go fishing" response. So bass fishing is on and I am soon out the door if I can find some warm clothes for a day on the water.
I hope my door key works when I come home tonight.
Posted by: whitewall | Sunday, 18 October 2015 at 12:33
To cheer you up, a scene from this millennium's Shakespeare: -
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XAOzMs9HbWg
SoD
Posted by: Lawrence Duff | Sunday, 18 October 2015 at 12:37
I notice that one of the signatories of the letter suggesting we take in lots of Arabs and things, is the Bishop of Truro. He has a big house in Truro that used to be for spiritual retreats, set in large gardens. It is now used for conferences and so on. You could probably get a few hundred Arabs in there. Just down the road is the local TA place. I expect they have some tents and lots of razor wire, enabling the Bishop to take even more migrants. The food banks in Truro, which the Bishop likes, could be re-directed to feed the migrants. Combine all this with a special tax on the clergy - what's not to like?
Posted by: backofanenvelope | Sunday, 18 October 2015 at 14:31
The reference to the New York Mets' victory had to do with a playoff game in our baseball World Series. They beat my hometown Chicago Cubs who were the favorites. The Cubs have not won the world title in 107 years, so it was really no surprise.
Thanks for the link to the Russian video. I have no idea what context to put it in, but it made me smile.
Posted by: Bob | Sunday, 18 October 2015 at 16:48
Do let us know, 'Whiters', what you catch and whether or not it was big enough and tasty enough to keep Mrs. WW happy.
Not quite, Lawrence, but I will try the DVD set one of these days.
Well, frankly, BOE, given that you have zillions of acres of open spaces down there in Cornwall then the least you could do is take a half a million Syrians!
Bob, that is the context, it makes you smile, who needs anything more?!
Posted by: David Duff | Sunday, 18 October 2015 at 17:25
I'm sure you thanked me for sending you that delightful Russian flash dance clip and I'm happy that you're still enjoying it.
Posted by: Andra | Sunday, 18 October 2015 at 20:26
I'm sure I must have done, Andra, because it really is one of my favourites especially if I'm in a grumpy mood.
Posted by: David Duff | Sunday, 18 October 2015 at 21:22
"I'm sure you thanked me for sending you that delightful Russian flash dance clip and I'm happy that you're still enjoying it."
You're questioning Andra, whether David offers sufficient "Thankee Kindlys" enough due?
Andra Our Dear, we are ALL round here at D&N ever admiring your regards ...
http://duffandnonsense.typepad.com/duff_nonsense/2014/01/a-tit-or-two-a-day-keeps-the-doctor-away.html
Posted by: JK | Monday, 19 October 2015 at 00:33
David, I think the mitre constricts the brain in the heads of those C of E Bishops. So they want to import people into our country who for centuries have preached hatred against the infidel. England has gone crazy. Cameron should stand his ground.
Posted by: jimmy glesga | Monday, 19 October 2015 at 10:59
David, thanks for asking. I caught 5 decent size bass fish but always throw them back. I like to fish for the fun of it and just observe nature. I got home about dark and my key fit the lock! As a bonus, Mrs. WW had something bubbling away in the cauldron too. A good day.
Posted by: whitewall | Monday, 19 October 2015 at 13:51
Well, that's alright then.
Posted by: Andra | Monday, 19 October 2015 at 20:02
Author’s Note: This piece was written just moments after the Mets clinched an NLDS victory — a victory greater, more astounding, and more remarkable than any since Agincourt.
Perhaps my American readers will understand the reference!
Maybe greater, but the quality of English used was no match for Agincourt.
Posted by: whitewall | Tuesday, 20 October 2015 at 14:34