The first 'Funny' is really more a lesson of life, or at least, legal life:
A lawyer had a wife and 12 children and needed to move as his rental agreement was coming to an end for the home where he lived but was having difficulty in finding a new home.
When he said he had 12 children, no one would rent a home to him because they knew that the children would destroy the home.
He could not say that he had no children, he could not lie, after all, lawyers cannot and do not lie. So, he had an idea: he sent his wife for a walk to the cemetery with 11 of the children.
He took the remaining one with him to see homes with the Real Estate Agent.
He liked one of the homes and the agent asked: "How many children do you have?"
He answered: "12 children".
The agent asked "Where are the others ?
The lawyer answered with a sad look, "They are in the cemetery with their mother".
And that's the way he was able to rent a home for his family without lying
MORAL: It is not necessary to lie, one only has to choose the right words.
Lawyers don't lie, they are just creative!
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Did you ever wonder why earrings became so popular with men? A man is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker is wearing an earring. The man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow and is curious about his sudden change in "fashion sense."
The man walks up to him and says, "I didn't know you were into earrings."
"Don't make such a big deal, it's only an earring," he replies sheepishly.
His friend falls silent for a few minutes, but then his curiosity prods him to ask, "So, how long have you been wearing one?"
"Ever since my wife found it in my truck.”
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A Hotel guest calls the Front desk and the clerk answers, "May I help you?"
The man says, "Yes, I'm in room 858. You need to send someone to my room immediately. I'm having an argument with my wife and she says she's going to jump out the window."
The desk clerk says, "I'm sorry sir, but that's a personal matter."
The man replies, "Listen you idiot. The window won't open... and that's a maintenance matter."
Right, that's your lot this morning and as you've all had an extra hour in bed the boss expects a rise in productivity this week!
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