Dozy Duff: I'm still feeling a bit dozy - oh alright then, dozier than normal - because I woke up early, went down and pulled the cover off the bird table and then sat and watched the usual feeding frenzy. As the 'Memsahib' was still asleep I sneaked in for a quick cuddle - and promptly fell asleep again for an hour! I now feel like 's,h,1,t'! And of course, during my two day absence, a host of stories have hit the headlines for me to comment on, er, when my brain clears, that is!
Gunfight at the 'Not-so-OK Corral': There are so many facets to these incidents that it is difficult to think your way through to any sensible conclusion. However, one detail seems - just! - to be seeping into the original media reports in which a cop shot dead a black man during a routine traffic stop. As always, the Left-wing biased media failed to point out that it was not a 'routine traffic stop'. The man was stopped because he closely resembled a man who had carried out an armed robbery in the locale just a few days earlier. Thus, the cop was taking no chances - particularly when he saw that the man was armed. Later 'reports' that the man had a legal permit to 'Carry and Conceal' were denied by the local Sheriff who said that no such permit was issued by his office, and it's still not clear that the man had even purchased the weapon legally. None of that, of course, was allowed to spoil the Left-wing fable that this was just another case of a cop killing an innocent man.
Taffy the Texter: I see that, according to The Mail, that jumped-up Taffy, Stephen Crabb MP, who suddenly appeared from nowhere in order to run for the leadership of the Tory party based not least on his self-proclaimed Christian piety, has been outed as a secret sex-texter. Where do these 'stoopids' come from? Is there a factory somewhere that churns them out?
And talking of 'stoopids': There is always the Labour party to snigger over. With Stakhanovite industry the 'Bruvvers' have dug an enormous hole and hand in comradely hand they are all jumping in! It all began, of course, under the leadership (who giggled?) of Ed 'the Dork' Miliband who allowed anyone and his dog to gain a vote in a leadership election for £3. Cue: a stampede of juveniles whose combined intelligence just about equalled that of an amoeba. The result was 'Jezza', and the end is nigh!
Meanwhile, over on the Right: Mrs. Leadsom, of whom I had some hopes, managed to create an enormous and solid lead ball and then, with due diligence and care, dropped in on her own foot! The way is now clear for 'St. Theresa of the May' to step elegantly in her leopard-pattern high heels into No. 10 provided she can avoid a similar gaffe - remember "The nasty party"? What she will be like as a Prime Minister I do not know but 'I ha'e ma doots', as 'Jimmy Glesga' might put it. You never can tell ahead what sort of a fist they will make of it but then again, I remember my misgivings when 'that woman' took over and she was brilliant.
This might lead to war: Here in 'Chateau Duff' we, by which I mean the 'Memsahib' and I, rarely if ever argue over what to watch on the 'telly', not least because there is hardly anything of interest on it as far as I can ever tell. But today could be different. The 'Memsahib' is a besotted 'plink-plonk' fan where-as I remain a keen follower of F1 racing. Needless to say, this afternoon the Wimbledon final will be playing at the same time as the British GP. "There will be blood"!
Meanwhile, 'down under there', chaos reigns: I must await a full report and analysis from my two Aussie reporters, Andra and AussieD, before I can give you a definitive description but it appears that the Right wing party have sort of, more or less, by and large, snuck into the winners' enclosure after the recent election. But as always, the devil is in the detail and it seems that the erstwhile prime minister, Malcolm Turnbull (or Malcolm Turncoat as some call him!) will face extreme difficulties in pushing through any legislation. Time for another crate of Fosters, methinks!
It's going to be a travesty, I tell you: I refer, of course, to the up-coming production of Tom Stoppard's peculiar but brilliant play, Travesties, which is going to run at the Menier Chocolate Factory theatre in London. It is a great play not least because it held up even when I directed it some years ago (with help from 'Miss Mayfly' who was my Stage Manager)! Only Stoppard could manage to stitch together the fact that in 1917 in Zurich there lived Henry Carr, the British consul, who sued James Joyce for the price of a pair of trousers made for a production of The Importance of Being Earnest, and Tristan Tzara, the instigator of the Dada-ist movement. In addition, a certain Vladimir Ilyich Ulyanov (aka: Lenin) and his wife make an appearance because they, too, were in Zurich at the time but desperate to return to Russia where the revolution had taken place. If you're quick there are tickets available - and Tom Hollander (Corky from The Night Manager) is playing in it. Need I say more?
Thank God he won! No, no, no, not that gobby Jock in the 'plink-plonk' match! I mean that fine upstanding example of English gentility and sportsmanship, Mr (Sir???) Lewis Hamilton, of course. He drove like a dream and thoroughly thrashed that young Hun who has had the impertinence to take the lead in the Divers' Championship. But now that lead is cut to just 4 points and if young Hamilton can drive him off the course, oops, sorry, I mean outdrive him at the German Grand Prix my cup will over-floweth!
An 'aaaaah' story, and from America too! Reported in The Telegraph, eight handcuffed prisoners being held in a cell pending court appearances rushed to the aid of a prison guard who collapsed with a heart attack. They shouted and tried to use his radio to call for assistance and as a result the guard's life was saved. There, that makes you all feel better doesn't it?!
No more Rumbles today
I am toying with the idea of presenting myself as a candidate and expect a thorough investigation of my past.
It would be nice to know what went on when I was in my twentys.
Posted by: Timbo | Sunday, 10 July 2016 at 10:46
Perhaps the Americans need to amend Amendment 2; African Americans do not have the right to bear arms.
Posted by: backofanenvelope | Sunday, 10 July 2016 at 11:00
Yep, Blighty's political class matches the voter base for its intelligence, honesty, and competence.
With the deformed constitution - what little of it was worthwhile now having been over-ridden by the mob-referendum - we now have tick, tick, tick in the "pre-requisites for a failed state" list: -
1. Deformed democratic constitution replaced by "rile of mob-referendum"
2. Rotten political class
3. Dumbed down, leftist, nativist, xenophobic, mercantilist voter base
Cuntbumpists arise! Tomorrow belongs to you.
SoD
Posted by: Loz | Sunday, 10 July 2016 at 12:12
I can't make heads or tails of the "sorting out" from the recent Aussie elections. Just like here in the US, it seems not only are political parties hopelessly divided, but the parties are divided within. Maybe New Zealand is in better order.
As far as up coming elections for various nations including Britain and America, we see what democracy begins to look like when the culture supporting it has become rotten. You "over there" appear to have two wimmin' to pick from, while over here, we have a felon or a clown. For us the natural answer is simple...race riots. Just in time.
Posted by: Whitewall | Sunday, 10 July 2016 at 13:58
Gun fight at the NoK Corral was well planned by a race hater who became a domestic terrorist for the cause of Leftist inspired race hate. The irony was thick...Dallas was not the scene of the recent shootings of blacks by police. The quasi terrorist group BLM was holding a peaceful anti police violence march, protected by peaceful police officers when the shots rang out. The marchers scattered with police shielding them where possible or directing them which way to run. Then the police moved toward the gun shots.
About the two incidents of shooting, St.Paul and Baton Rouge, we have seen video of both and each is damning of the police officers involved. But have we seen all video and know all the facts? Maybe. The Dept. of Justice---yes I know---has moved in fast on these cases. The results may or may not be what we suspect. No matter, the Left and the race industry have casualties and the media have blood shed, so there you go. Hillary for General Secretary...I mean president.
Posted by: Whitewall | Sunday, 10 July 2016 at 14:25
There is now a photo of Bill C meeting with the head of Black Lives Matter. With that, it appears that the Democrats are in league with the rioters. This is not good for the Left. There is no shortage of suicidally simple on the Left, but really, now. Do they not see that even their lap-dog media can not turn this to the Left's advantage?
Posted by: Michael Adams | Sunday, 10 July 2016 at 14:32
Since Christians have shot up women's health clinics and police, we should change the 2nd Amendment to prevent Christians from getting guns.
There's not enough information on all the publicized shootings to draw conclusions yet. Are the accusations of fantasy made here supposed to be ironic?
Posted by: Bob | Sunday, 10 July 2016 at 15:30
David, maybe you can wake up for tea?
Posted by: Whitewall | Sunday, 10 July 2016 at 15:37
Bob (@15:30)
I think one should strike while the irony's hot, though it's often difficult to distinguish irony from stupidity online.
Anyway, if at first we came for the Christians, is there any doubt what the final solution would turn out to be?
And, btw, who's the "we" in "..., we should change the 2nd Amendment"?
Posted by: TheBigHenry | Sunday, 10 July 2016 at 19:31
Oh dear, don't tell me somebody actually cares who, if anyone, has won in Oz. Well, since you asked .....
As I see it, Australians are just so apathetic that we really don't give a damn who's in charge and if voting wasn't compulsory very few people would bother to take the trouble to go and cast a ballot - only the fanatics and lunatics would venture out to the local school and fight their way past the cake stalls and sausage sizzles.
In my humble opinion the two leaders of the major parties, Turnbull (Liberal) and Shorten (Labour - they can't even spell it!) are both obviously smart blokes but they are both so damned arrogant they don't even know the old line ..... humility - if you can fake that you've got it made.
For me, Turnbull is less odious that Shorten (I don't like Shorten's head - it's rather boofy, I think!) and he's apparently done some pretty shifty deals with his beloved unions. I rather think he and the even more odious Ms Gillard should be sharing a cell in some backwater community.
The voting paper for the Senate (the Upper House) was 3 or 4 feet wide and included such exciting prospects as the Surf Paddlers' Party, the Oyster Eating Party, the Sex Party, the Marijuana Party, the I Love My Cat Party and the One-legged Motor Mechanics' Party. Well, I can't remember what they all were but, take my word for it, there were some seriously stupid people wanting to get on the bandwagon, and some of them undoubtedly did.
Aussie D might be a bit more enlightening but that's pretty much all I know about it.
Next time I might give it a go as the Wine Drinkers' Party. That would work!
Posted by: Andra | Sunday, 10 July 2016 at 20:49
Andra,
Sounds like Shorten needs to be shortened -- by a head. Where's Henry VIII when you need his majesty?
As for the "Wine Drinkers' Party", where do I sign up? I'll have a glass of Pinot Noir, if you please.
Posted by: TheBigHenry | Sunday, 10 July 2016 at 23:19
Well, all the mass shooters have been Democrats, so disarming Democrats might help. The first gun control laws, against carrying a concealed weapon, were passed at the end of Reconstruction, to prevent Blacks from defending themselves from small but randomly traveling mobs. Repealing such laws has invariably been followed by declines in crime in the jurisdiction that now allows concealed carry again.
As a public health statistic, the victims in abortuaries can be counted on the fingers of one hand, and the shooters/bombers have been pursued by police, tried in courts with prosecutors, juries and judges, all of whom were overwhelmingly Christian. I am more worried about Zika virus, and even that is near the very bottom of my public health concerns.
Posted by: Michael Adams | Monday, 11 July 2016 at 00:04
G'day Duffers et al.
Andra pretty well summed it up.
My take on the elections down here in Oz?
Labor [as Andra pointed out the bastards can't even spell] is led by an ex-student/lawyer/union official/politician [says it all really doesn't it] who you wouldn't trust to look after the Tea Club money let alone the finances of a Nation State.
The Liberal Party [allegedly conservative] is led by a smarmy, untrustworthy ex-student/lawyer/merchant banker who you would not trust near the sharp kitchen cutlery as he has a propensity to stab people in the back. He also has the impression that he was born to rule. He also engineered a coup to dispose of the sitting Prime Minister who was responsible for one of the biggest election victories in the 115 year history of our Federation.
Then there is the National Party who were formerly called the Country Party as they were supposed to represent rural Australia. They form a coalition with the Liberals and supply the Deputy Prime Minister.
The Greens - not even going to go there as this blog does have some standards.
Then there a whole lot of minor players seeking to act as King makers. Some with good policies [e.g. Australian Liberty Alliance] but without the numbers to govern in their own right.
Labor are f-----g hopeless. A large proportion of their candidates wanted to open our borders to the mendicant country shoppers of a head lopping persuasion. Most Aussies are happy with the idea that we control our immigration so that played against them. That and six years of unmitigated disasters when they were last in "gummint".
The Liberals? Their erstwhile leader [Malcolm Turnmerkel] should really be in the Labor Party and made the election all about him. Epic fail. Most people I know can't stand the arrogant bastard for a number of reasons an important one of which was his stabbing of Tony Abbott, the man who led the Liberals to victory at the last election, among others. His arrogance alienated the corps of conservative voters who put the Coalition in power. To add to that one of the major strategists, a wanker called Mark Textor, publicly stated that the conservative corps of voters were irrelevant as Turncoat [his name changes regularly] would pluck a myriad of voters from the centre left [epic fail].
The result of all this was that the plebs went looking for conservative alternatives relegating the Liberal/National candidates to second or third place on the ballot while mostly putting Labor and The Greens down the bottom. Remember we have a compulsory preferential voting system. Don't get me wrong as there are rusted on Labor voters who will always vote for "the bruvvers" no matter what. The Greens are confined to the inner capital city late/capucino sipping intellectuals who wear slip on shoes because tying laces is too difficult a task.
Well the Coalition has scraped home to form a majority "gummint" with the Nationals saving their bacon [Halal of course] and with more say so hopefully there will be a swing back to more conservative/libertarian values [but I am not holding my breath]. It will be interesting to see how long Malcolm Turncoat remains as PM before there is a Palace Coup. A good number of those who supported him in his assassination of Tony Abbott as PM lost their seats due to the plebs backlash against treacherous behaviour.
Now is all that clear? Good.
Normal transmission will now resume.
Posted by: AussieD | Monday, 11 July 2016 at 02:37
Just for the record David, Leadsom was set up. I think that the worst that you could accuse her of is inexperience in dealing with the Media. Listen and judge for yourself...
http://order-order.com/2016/07/09/listen-full-leadsom-times-tape-recording/
Posted by: Richard | Monday, 11 July 2016 at 06:20
Aussie D:
How about Julie Bishop, just sitting quietly back and not annoying anybody?
Next PM do you think?
Posted by: Andra | Monday, 11 July 2016 at 07:06
G'day Andra,
Julie Bishop? After all the support she was given by Abbott the treacherous bitch was part of the assassination squad.
I used to think she had the makings of a leader but her efforts in the last three years have convinced me otherwise. All she is good for is Foreign Minister swanning around drinking champers at overseas parties.
I am not a fan.
There are far more talented women in the Libs.
Posted by: AussieD | Monday, 11 July 2016 at 09:50
Richard, 'savvy' politicians usually spot the trap.
A huge 'thank you' to my two Aussie political analysts who, I think everyone will agree, provided us all with excellent summaries of the political scene 'down under there'.
Posted by: David Duff | Monday, 11 July 2016 at 10:59
It seems the Anglo-Saxon people are difficult to govern?
Posted by: Whitewall | Monday, 11 July 2016 at 11:33
No need to place a question mark at the end, Whiters, it's a given!
Posted by: David Duff | Monday, 11 July 2016 at 11:35
@ TheBigHenry
Written sarcasm and irony are always difficult. The international cultural aspect makes them even more opaque, but I don't shy from a challenge. The "we" is the one in "we the people", which through political over-use in America has become just one more ironic phrase.
Posted by: Bob | Monday, 11 July 2016 at 14:38
Bob,
The complete phrase is "We the People of the United States, ...". Are you an American?
My question was not a challenge. It was simply an implicit reminder that amending the Constitution of the United States is a privilege that extends only to the people of the United States.
Posted by: TheBigHenry | Monday, 11 July 2016 at 18:53