Why do socialists find it so hard to eat? 'Up over here', we have only just recovered from the sight of Ed Miliband attempting to look like, er, you know, a real 'prole' by eating a bacon sandwich in a café. The result was hilarious:
Meanwhile, 'down under there', the leader of the Australian socialist party has attempted the same thing:
Big fail! Even so, I must call upon my Aussie mates for some explanation for the surprising election results 'down under there'. What's going on? And please tell me there is no chance of that ghastly woman with the incomprehensible accent returning to my news bulletins! By the way, sorry if the pics up above ruined your breakfast.
'I'm innocent, I tell ya, innocent!' 'Honest ta God, y'all got the wrong gal!'
Yes, sorry again, yet another ghastly photograph. Still and all (as they say 'over there'), such fun to be had at the thought of that female, lying liar being grilled by the FBI. Mind you, I suspect they were all falling over themselves to be ultra polite to the dreadful little 'perp', referring to her constantly as 'Madame Secretary' or 'Senator Clinton'. What I wouldn't give to see her in yellow overalls!
I have been diagnosed with GES: I know, I know, a fate worse than death! And alas, Galloping Ennui Syndrome has no known cure for someone of my age. Years ago if I became eye-stabbingly bored by something I could always turn to sex but, alas, these days not only is the flesh not willing, nor is the spirit! Of course, it is in the Summer that GES reaches the depths because there is nothing to distract me except endless 'Plink-Plonk' from Wimbledon, or 'rounders' from the Oval (cricket having disappeared years ago), or even worse, the England non-Football team. Is it any wonder that my attention is diverted to Brazilian Ladies Volley-ball but, dammit, the coverage on my 'telly' is virtually non-existent. I may have to make up with my old ex-best friend, Rupe, especially during the Olympics. Here's a pic to make up for those ghastly ones above:
And now the splitters ooze out of the paintwork: Beginning with the biggest 'oozer' of the lot, Tony Blair. Never mind, he says, that a majority of Brits voted for 'OUT', who cares about all that democracy lark, we, the political class know best what's best for you lot! Suddenly, Blair is here, there and everywhere in London so my guess is that the Chilcot enquiry will slap whitewash all over him. If he had a hint that he might get his collar felt he would have sent his messages from some dictatorial dump in Asia where he is always so very welcome!
Why did Obama send us a dipstick? I ask because, according to The Mail, the American ambassador to the Court of St. James, Mr. Matthew Barzun, has let it be known that he and his wife are in, er, 'couples therapy' - yeeeeees, quite! Apparently she is a therapist and he is the son of a therapist so one is tempted to suggest 'therapist, heal thyself!', According to this latter-day Talleyrand, "
'It is really important to think about what you say and to be honest. 'You know, that's between two people, and not two countries. But I think the same should apply.'
Where do they find these people?
No more rumbles later today
Duffers as I see it the results down here have several factors which influenced the vote;
1. People are generally pissed off with pollies who believe they are born to rule and know better than the GUP [Great Unwashed Public]. Hence a big swing to independent candidates.
2. Malcolm Turnbull [the leader of our so called conservatives]and also known as Lord Waffle of Wentworth [that being his electorate] is seen as a deceiving, backstabbing, elitist prick [on his good days] responsible for knifing the PM who decimated the ALP at the previous election. Those who assisted in the knifing were identified and the normally conservative voting public punished them for it.
3. The ALP ran a very successful scare campaign about our public health system which was all lies and Shorten, the ALP leader and subject of that photo, as much as admitted so after the close of polling.
4. The large number of independent candidates drew a large percentage of support from people who would normally be conservative distorting the primary vote in our preferential system.
There are other issues of course but I feel these are the principal issues.
The final result will not be known for some days. We are in for interesting times.
A pox on all their houses.
Posted by: AussieD | Sunday, 03 July 2016 at 12:00
AussieD...According to Quadrant Online, the Labor candidate literally scaremongered his way to office since the Conservatives were so deeply divided. Sounds a bit like here in the US. I saw another article titled "Time for Stable Cleaning" on the Conservative side. Meantime, the Laborites will go on with their PC madness I guess while assuring the public that no benefits will be touched. The Left knows the key to winning.
Posted by: Whitewall | Sunday, 03 July 2016 at 14:09
"The Left knows the key to winning."
Happily, over here, Whiters, they seem to have lost the keys. The Trotskyite Left led by 'Jezza' (allegedly the party leader) refuses to have any truck with his own MPs. Such fun!
Posted by: David Duff | Sunday, 03 July 2016 at 14:47
David, I've noticed that. Over here, it is the Right that is at odds among itself. We have principled patriots and Vichy Republicrats or something. Anyway, I believe we in "America" are in the midst of a bloodless coup with HRC, Obama's Attorney General and now Bill Clinton making his move in broad daylight. One of the keys to winning for the Left is simply outright theft.
Posted by: Whitewall | Sunday, 03 July 2016 at 15:08
"Suddenly, Blair is here, there and everywhere in London so my guess is that the Chilcot enquiry will slap whitewash all over him. If he had a hint that he might get his collar felt"
Well, mebbe he does have some sort of "hint" as your man Blair (do I need to hit the archives David?) is scheduled to be in Arkansas July 15th.
And ... drumroll ... The Clinton Foundation HQ the following morning of the 16th. What's it all mean Alfie?
Posted by: JK | Sunday, 03 July 2016 at 19:42
Apropos your GES diagnosis, I assume you refer to "Gaz à Effet de Serre (French: Greenhouse Gas Emissions)"? :)
Posted by: TheBigHenry | Sunday, 03 July 2016 at 20:28
On this side of the pond, some of us attribute socialists' difficulty eating to their predisposition for eating crow, viz. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eating_crow
Posted by: TheBigHenry | Sunday, 03 July 2016 at 20:35
Posted by: TheBigHenry | Sunday, 03 July 2016 at 20:38
I sometimes wonder if "therapist" is one word or two. I guess it depends on whether "is" should be "are".
Posted by: TheBigHenry | Sunday, 03 July 2016 at 20:45
Very witty, TBH!
Posted by: David Duff | Sunday, 03 July 2016 at 21:38
Posted by: TheBigHenry | Sunday, 03 July 2016 at 22:13
G'day Whitewall. The "Quadrant on Line" is always a good read.
TBH I am [somewhat] reliably informed by an old friend that should one have the former the latter is somewhat painful.
Posted by: AussieD | Monday, 04 July 2016 at 00:36
AussieD,
Well, I understand where you're coming from. But I was referring to the satisfaction of those who piss on all those houses. Either way, however, there is satisfaction to be gotten. Sorry, Jagger.
Posted by: TheBigHenry | Monday, 04 July 2016 at 03:50
BTW, Duff, have a happy July 4th (assuming you have one in Britain :)
Posted by: TheBigHenry | Monday, 04 July 2016 at 04:00
Well Henry.
David, Andra, SoD and (probably) Jimmy took up observing in honor of me, All Digits Day for their July Hooraw. So that'd be the bigger bits of the UK.
And yep David, Andra, SoD and Jimmy - as tonight was my "private display" and I still got all my digits - I expect y'all to carry on as before.
Perhaps especially this year - no cars were harmed in the production!
Posted by: JK | Monday, 04 July 2016 at 05:14
JK,
I'm a bit slow on the uptake. Am I supposed to know this stuff?
1) What is "All Digits Day"? I got no hints from Google.
2) Why in honor of you?
3) I've been wondering who SoD is -- Is he "Son of David"?
4) Private display? Are you flashing people in the town square?
5) Is there a town square where you live?
6) Are you drinking while setting off fireworks in the dark?
Please enlighten me.
Your confused friend,
Henry
Posted by: TheBigHenry | Monday, 04 July 2016 at 06:30
TBH, here at D&N we are proud to have at our disposal the finest collection of incoherent eccentrics anywhere in 'blogdom'. If you manage to stick with this loony-bin after a while you will begin to make sense of it - and that is the point at which you should become worried and consider seeking medical advice!
Reading 'JK' can sometimes be rather like reading the works of 'e e cummings' - backwards! Alas, 'JK' inhabits the wilder parts of Arkansas (than which no wilder parts may be imagined) and has, alas, fallen under the spell of a certain Barney Magroo, a self-styled purveyor of, er, "Fine Wines & Spirits to the Gentry". Not that 'JK' partakes of these noxious liquids, no, no, an earlier period of his life was conducted in the US Navy where, as you probably know, strong drink is frowned upon! No, the problem for 'JK' is that he lives down-wind from one of Mr. Magroo's stills up in 'them thar hills' and if the wind is in the wrong direction then the normally, quiet, reserved, shy and scholarly 'JK' may become, er, lively, shall we say?
As for 'SoD', allow me to reprint an algorithm which explains all:
Loz = Lawrence = SoD = Son of Duff. What can I say, except 'sorry'!
Posted by: David Duff | Monday, 04 July 2016 at 09:05
Henry, when the sun rises out there, you might have a headache by now. Britain now has their own "July 4", it is called June 23, 2016. Oh, and wait for SoD to get really wound up and do his full family pedigree chart dating back many centuries. Every time he writes it all down, I have the urge to either stand at attention or bend one knee just enough...the feudal spirit thing you know.
Posted by: Whitewall | Monday, 04 July 2016 at 13:33
No, no, Whiters, just bend the knee sufficiently to give him a good kick in the arse!
Posted by: David Duff | Monday, 04 July 2016 at 13:53
David...what if he decides to return the favor? What ever shall I do then?
Posted by: Whitewall | Monday, 04 July 2016 at 14:14
Henry, JK shouldn't be allowed to play with fireworks, or dynamite or other things which may go "bang" in the night.
And, as DD so rightly says, JK is supposed to stay upwind of the still at all times.
Apart from that he's just fine, mostly.
Posted by: Andra | Monday, 04 July 2016 at 20:03
Duff, Robert (Whitewall), Andra,
Thanx guys for coming to my rescue. Actually, I have "interacted" with JK on Malcolm Pollack's blog (waka waka waka) for several years now, with mixed, albeit most friendly, success. I am well aware that he is very intelligent and that my difficulty in understanding him has largely to do with my inability to master Arkansasian, a language spoken only by a few dozen people in the Ozarks. I am making progress, however. Just last week I understood him completely when he wrote, "Have a nice weekend."
Posted by: TheBigHenry | Tuesday, 05 July 2016 at 00:30