The Sunday Rumble: 28.7.19

This is better than "Downton Abbey":   As regular readers will have gathered over the years, I am not much of a one for dwelling on high society and its 'goings on', however, this story in The Mail had me chortling 'n' chuckling.  To give you the flavour, this is a copy of the reply sent by Lady Carolyn Seymore, aunt, to the wedding invitation from her beloved (not!) nephew, William, Earl of Yarmouth, on the occasion of his wedding:

I'd take that as a 'No', m' Lord!  Read the whole thing, it's hilarious!  By the way, they are repeating the "Downton Abbey" series on TV and I had forgotten how brilliantly written and produced they were.  The 'Memsahib' has requested a box-set of the videos.  Yes, m' Lady, immediately!

 

So who, exactly, is this Amor Towles?   I don't know but I think I should be told!  He has a wiki entry but to call it minimal would be an exaggeration!  He is, of course, the author of "A Gentleman in Moscow" about which I tipped y'all off a couple of weeks ago.  I was bowled over by the opening pages which I kindly and generously typed out for you - no, no, don't thank me, just the usual 'folding stuff' in a plain brown envelope!  I have progressed since then but somewhat slowly due to the heat wave we have all suffered - dammit! we don't 'do' heatwaves in 'Zummerzet'.  Even so, as I press onward I am truly impressed with the elegance and the wisdom of Mr. Towles' composition.  He is both witty and wise and, dammit, exceedingly erudite, and he has created a truly imaginative setting in Moscow circa 1922.  My only worry is that having created a gallery of immensely attractive characters, given the time and the place, I fear for their future.  I would say that this is a truly great work of literature.  Do yourselves a favour and beg, borrow or steal a copy!

 

Sort of 'Good News':   I am more than a tad worried about Boris' promise to spend money like a drunken sailor, however, the 'Good News' might be that if 'Jezza' and his apparat ever win an election there will be no money in the till and the lenders will have fled!

 

Peter Hitchens owns up:   Feeling a bit more cheerful after 'Boing-Boing's ascendency, were you?  Well, I was but Peter 'Jeremiah' Hitchens soon put a stop to that in his opening sentence:

I am a Doomster and a Gloomster, and proud of it. I am always suspicious of anyone, in politics or business, who demands permanent optimism and treats doubt as disloyalty.

Well, yes, you're right as usual, Peter, but just for once try and get over yourself and rejoice that the 'Maybot' is no more!

 

That "damned Hun" did well!   I am frequently rather rude about Sebastian Vettel but only because he is a rival to (Sir) Lewis Hamilton.  I haven't seen the race yet but I gather that there were lots of 'thrills and spills' but Vettel drove brilliantly which is unsurprising because he really is an excellent driver.  Alas, (Sir) Lewis was nowhere - something to do with dodgy weather at the Hockenheim circuit.  Incidentally, I don't know whether I have told you this before but I actualy hold the circuit record at Hockenheim.  No, no, not in an F1 racing car but in a Ford Transit van with a trailer on the back!  I was there in my capacity as publicity man for Yardley cosmetics who backed the old BRM team.  I sneaked onto the track before the race and did a circuit to show off the Yardley Cosmetics logos.  People still speak of it in hushed tones, er, well, I do!

 

Gotta hand it to 'The Donald'!   As regular readers know, I am an expert on life in Baltimore having been a dedicated viewer of "Homicide: Life on the Street" and all the series of "The Wire"!  Thus, given that Baltimore is a 'fester-pit' and run by crooks, it was a brilliant move on Trump's part to give that ghastly Baltimore politician, Elijah Cummings, what we would call over here 'a Glesgie kiss' - my e-pal, Jimmy Glesga, will provide a full explanation.  Suffice to say, that it was a master tactic for him to shine his 'twitter light' on Cumming's own disgusting backyard.  Far from being racist, I suspect that quite a number of black residents will be cheering Donald on.

 

I am a forgetful nitwit!   Beneath my desk sits a mysterious black box within which all sorts of 'whizzyd0' things happen to make my computer work.  Right at the top is a CD player which I know perfectly well because once upon a time I used it.  Then I forgot!  The other day, I rediscovered it and stuck in a selection of the late and very great George Gershwin.  Even for a wordy fellow like me, I cannot find the words to describe the absolute pleasure I get from his music.  Since then, I have given Ella Fitzgerald and Benny Goodman a go.  I tell you, there is no better way to start your day!

 

"Measure for Measure":   Just a tip off for my Brit readers but next Wednesday evening my local Cineworld Complex is showing a filmed production of "Measure for Measure" from the RSC.  One of old Bill's best, featuring a crooked, sex-maniac lawyer, a lovely Nun, and a totally dim-witted Duke.  Easy to follow and understand but, as always with old Bill, full of subtlety.  Check up, it may be on in your town.

 

 

 

No more rumbles

 

 

Comments

[AussieD]

What a pack of inbred wankers.

[Whitewall]

My my! If this young couple can hang on a few years, karma will take over and they can treat his classless parents in the same manner. Maybe lease them a small cottage in the back forty. With a sturdy chimney and tight roof and roomy fireplace.

[Whitewall]

Buying the Downton series in box set is what we did. After the tv series was over. Same with "Victoria" but a season at a time this time. We may never see a product as fine as "Downton Abbey" again in our lifetimes.

[David Duff]

I missed a lot of it at the time, Whiters, but having seen a couple of the re-run episodes I want to see the lot. Didn't try the "Victoria" series, the girl playing the part was far too pretty compared to the original who was a bit of a 'porker'!

[JK]

Nah worries David about your 'Sort of Good News' because the way I figure it The Donald would almost certainly accept The Boris' cheque.

And after that acceptance then the UK can "safely invest" is US Treasury Bonds.

Now I do allow as David you're probably thinkin' "Wha? I thought the Chinese bought all the US's debt?"

Nah worries about that either. Back about a week ago the Democrat led House (you do know David the House of Representatives holds (figuratively) control of our purse-strings?) Anyway the House reached a budget deal which I understand will make $2,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000+/- fairly immediately available.

I suspect David about the only thing you might express some concerns over is however much Treasuries Boris (and yourself) purchase - probably some of that will go toward fixing Congressman Elijah Cummings' rat problem.

You did mention as I recall from above David something about a fondness for things Baltimore? Maybe David, you could write Congressman Cummings about working on a side-deal (using your 'expertise' in second-hands dealing) by which maybe English cuisine could be supplemented? I know Londonistan is now home to a large number of Asians? Have SoD check with his pals there in Londonistan for possible recipes.

It should be a "win-win" David. I mean, what could possibly go wrong?

[David Duff]

I suppose, JK, that the, er, Special Relationship means that when we both go 'tits up' at least we'll be together!

[JK]

And likely reduced to eating rats together too.

[Whitewall]

Trump is right: https://townhall.com/columnists/kevinmccullough/2019/07/28/why-do-democrats-run-all-of-the-dangerous-and-rodent-infested-cities-n2550734

[Whitewall]

There seems to be sooo much profit in poverty.

[JK]

Good eye Whitewall.

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/bethbaumann/2019/07/28/watch-baltimore-resident-praises-trump-for-slamming-cummings-and-bringing-light-to-baltimores-issues-n2550735

And there's one back - Not for you so much Whitewall as it is for our Indiana sesquipedalian correspondent.

Should he deign to offer a rejoinder.

[missred]

Trump got his information and pretty much quoted Kimberly Klacik verbatim:
https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/news/trumps-infested-tweets-repeated-info-from-fox-news-segment-on-filthy-conditions-in-elijah-cummings-district
The radio news this morning was playing the responses of residents of West Baltimore in support of Kimberly's report and Trump's tweets.

[JK]

https://www.baltimoresun.com/entertainment/movies/bs-wk-movies-0915-story.html

[David Duff]

Sorry, JK, but the Baltimore Sun website is not available on European sites.
I expect they're too busy chasing rats!

[Whitewall]

Nice one David!

[JK]

"Too busy chasing rats!"

http://www.pbs.org/independentlens/blog/filmmaker-theo-anthony-ratty-urban-segregation-rat-film/

You don't know the half of it David.

Hopefully, and if Maryland's PBS (the state within which Baltimore is located) Anyway if, hopefully, Maryland's Public Broadcasting Station is accessible is available, scroll down to the photo of the two Baltimore residents featured.

The one has a fishing pole in hand from which a rat dangles.

Mayhaps the opportunity to supplement England's cuisine is easier attained than which I originally conjectured?

[JK]

By the way David, I've mentioned the photo featuring two residents of Baltimore describing only that which the one is holding?

The other fellow pictured is holding a baseball bat apparently "at the ready." Given the context of the photograph my best guess is the other guy isn't occupied in practice for a tryout for the city's Baltimore Orioles baseball team.

PBS you may not know but we here in the states most certainly are; PBS has a film in its archives where PETA is expressing outrage over guys with baseball bats conking seals over the head.

Where's the PETA outrage over Baltimoreans apparently conking rats?

I'm here to tell ya David, if PETA and "environmentally concerned" Congresspersons (I'm looking at you Elijah Cummings) didn't have double standards they'd have no standards at all!

[Hugh Mann]

A chap called James LaFond, a writer and combat instructor (hence 'the meanest s-o-b in the valley') lives in Baltimore and blogs about it at length.

https://www.amazon.com/s?i=stripbooks&rh=p_27%3AJames+LaFond&s=relevancerank&text=James+LaFond&ref=dp_byline_sr_book_1

You want rats? He got 'em.

http://www.jameslafond.com/article.php?id=90

“Mason had tracked the major rat activity on the East Side up across the train tracks that service the terminals [where the Grain Elevator from Timmy’s story is]. You see, the lose grain falls off of the trains and makes the tracks a feed trail for rats—a migratory route! He wanted to do an interdiction, hit their supply train; catch them in the open. He selected the field around the tracks where the train travels beneath the Edison Highway Bridge just above Highland Town. There were many, many rat holes in those fields.

“We took every team, there was over twenty of us, I think twenty-four, even me in my dress and high heels with a shovel—ready to kill rats! We had smoke bombs that would be dropped down the holes, and that’s what we did, we smoked them out. As the smoke began to rise from all of these holes that we had simultaneously dropped bombs into, we heard it. I couldn’t believe it myself. It was a sound I can’t truly describe; kind of a hiss, and a whine, and a scratching all at once, as if the ground beneath our feet was coming alive!

“It was terrible! There was no counting them and they were huge, easily as big as cats! The combination of the smoke rising to obscure our vision, the ankle deep grass brushing your ankles and the ground coming alive with all of these creatures—the enemy—was too much. Everybody but Mason broke and ran. There he stood; the Rat Killer, slaughtering rats, like Custer at the Little Big Horn. But the rest of us ran for our lives!”

He also has a fan-blog a la Dalrymple

https://jameslafond.blogspot.com/

[David Duff]

Thanks, Hugh, repulsive but fascinating. The likes of Elijah Cummings should be forced to sleep rough for a week on the streets of Baltimore!