DUFF & NONSENSE!

This is one book I haven't the courage to read

I'm not talking about physical courage but moral courage!  One word is enough to disclose the cause of my unease - Dresden!  I have just read a review of the book "Dresden: The Fire and the Darkness" by Sinclair MacKay.  It is reviewed, carefully, by Christopher Priest in this week's Spectator.  It is, I suppose, 'the bombing raid that dare not speak its name'!  I have known about it for around 60-odd years but steered clear of digging into it too deeply.  I understand, and to a certain extent I sympathise with the perpetrators, even the ghastly Air Marshall 'Bomber' Harris, but it should not have happened.

 

Dresden after the Allied bombing raids of 13 to 15 February 1945: an estimated 25,000 civilians were killed

 

It was, in effect, a war crime.  There was nothing of military or strategic value in the city which was, in fact, crammed with refugees from the many other bombed cities of Germany plus countless others fleeing from the Russian advance from the East.  It was a war crime executed with military precision in that low-flying Mosquitoes were used to plant flares to mark out the City centre for the fleets of heavy bombers which followed.  The next day, the American Air Force took over and completed the utter destruction of the ancient city and of several more thousands of civilians and refugees.

 

Nothing I have written is intended to blight the reputations of the unbelievably courageous air crews involved who were, to quote a phrase, simply obeying orders.  And, as anyone with a modicum of common-sense will know, "war is hell!" and should be avoided as much as is possible.  There is no way that WWII could be avoided but I do believe that the raid on Dresden should have been.

 

 

 

 

 

Sometimes my ignorance is excruciatingly embarrassing

I really must stop reading those 'bloody-bloody' history books which embarrass me so often.  At the moment I am reading an excellent history entitled "Providence Lost: The Rise and Fall of Oliver Cromwell's Protectorate" by Paul Wray.  An excellent book helped along by the occasional dry wit of the author.  Oliver Cromwell is not a man I have ever studied before and as this history received some excellent reviews I thought it was time to get down to it! 

I was expecting yet another chapter of head-chopping which seemed to be the sport of the day in 17th century Britain!  Indeed, there is plenty of that but what made me sit back in astonishment was information about the Jews!  I had not realised that the Jews had been totally expelled from Britain in 1290 by Edward I.  In the 1650s, Cromwell had two imperatives.  First he needed, so to speak, to 'spread the word of the Lord' and thereby convert those 'sinners' who failed to accept it.  The other imperative was, like British governments throughout the ages, the need for money, in this case, to help pay for his intended war against those Spanish Catholic heretics who owned all those gold and silver mines in South America.  An influx of wealth-creating Jews would be invaluable to pay for more ships and soldiers - and also provide a target for, er, 're-educating' them in the words of the Lord!

So far, I am not too impressed with Oliver Cromwell's government but if he was responsible for enriching - in all senses of that word - the fabric of British society then let us immediately erect a statue of him in Trafalgar Square!

 

 

'A E-P' sums it up - precisely!

Yes, Ambrose Evans-Pritchard in The Telegraph takes a long, hard, economic look at the state of play between Britain and Europe.  As regular readers do know, I am a practiced thief of other, more intelligent and educated writers's works, and not being an original thinker myself, I can usually be relied upon to steal their thoughts and observations.  However, in this case I was so impressed with A E-P's summary that I can only urge you all to read it:

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/business/2020/01/31/brexit-destiny-21st-century-watershed-philosophical-choice-far/

 

 

"Free again, happy, happy me, free again"!

What an extra-ordinary country I was lucky enough to be born in!  Nearly 50 years ago we made the colossal error of voting to join the EU - despite my advice to the contrary!  But gradually, bit by bit, ordinance by ordinance, enough of my fellow subjects woke up to the reality of rule by autocratic bureaucrats appointed not by "We the People" in a free vote but by backroom conclaves embedded in Brussels with their strings being pulled from Berlin and Paris.  In the end, "truth will out" such that even the previously purblind begin to see the glimmer of reality.

Sundry other countries have made half-hearted attempts to leave but have been forced to backtrack - but not us stubborn Brits!  Yes, of course, there will be mishaps and difficulties and mistakes will be made but, and this is the crucial and over-riding factor, we will now live by British law enforced by British courts.  An outcome much to be desired!

By the way, don't worry about that high-pitched noise you can hear in the background, it's only 'SoD' wailing and keening and gnashing his teeth - he'll get over it!

 

 

 

Good to see you again, Mr. Fumento!

A pleasant surprise for me today to come across Mr. Michael Fumento again after many years.  Described in The American Thinker today as a "master debunker", I will never forget his lonely tirade against the massed ranks of the 'PC brigade' back in the days of AIDS.  Desperate to avoid pointing fingers at homosexuals the mainstream 'meeja' twisted themselves in knots to emphasise that AIDS was as much a heterosexual disease as a homosexual one in order to avoid accusing careless and promiscuous homosexuals.

Virtually alone, it was Fumento who 'stated the bleedin' obvious', that if you make a regular habit of inserting your penis, without protection, into the anal passages of numerous men on a regular basis, you are likely, eventually, to catch a very nasty disease!  Cue an avalanche of hostile, or perhaps 'hysterical' is a better word, attacks against him from the 'PC brigade'.  In the end, particularly in medical/scientific matters, 'Truth will out" and he was right and the homosexual lobby was wrong!

Apparently, he is now commenting on this new virus attack emanating from China and is attempting to insert some facts into the hysterical garbage that is already mounting.  Well done, Mr. Fumento!

 

 

Now look here, America, you must, nay, you WILL watch this film!

After all, you owe her!  I mean, dammit, it was her turn and she deserved it but you let her lose!  You are all absolute scoundrels and so the least you can do to make amends is to spend four hours - oh come on, it's only FOUR hours! - watching this film which bears, alas, the unforgettable title of "HILLARY"!  Yes, it's about her, well everything, everywhere, all the time is about her. 

Alas, Mr. Kyle Smith of The National Review is definitely not a Hillary fan but don't let him put you off even if he does suggest that:

At some point in recent years, one or more of Hillary Clinton’s many handlers, advisers, or consultants told her, “You should laugh more. People like laughter.” Except she is sour, dour, and without a humorous molecule in her body. Her laughter is always feigned, hence always a non sequitur. When she reminds herself it’s laughing time, it comes across as a tic. It’s as bizarre as sudden-onset tap dancing.

Mr. Smith is obviously not a fan:

Her role today is that of a good-natured and not-at-all-bitter role model for tomorrow’s women. But her words betray her aggrievement and entitlement. She is not good at this. She was never good at this. She simply lacks the personality of a public-facing figure and should never have embarrassed herself trying to be one. If it hadn’t been for her proximity to William Jefferson Clinton, a man who genuinely did have a genius for connecting with people and lit up every room he was in for many years, the idea of trying to win elected office never would have infected her mind. There’s no shame in lacking political gifts. What is shameful is that she continues to blame her personal failings on the rest of us. [My emphasis]

And, of course, she is right!  It is all your fault, you very naughty 'Yankee-doodle-dandies', that you failed to recognise and reward a brave woman who merely sought to gain what was hers by right!  OK, OK, so she has a really irritating laugh habit - as Mr. Smith reminds us:

In more than a quarter of a century as a public figure she has never, as far as I know, said anything funny that wasn’t written for her. Yet in a fresh new batch of interviews taken for Hillary, the title figure becomes the second major movie anti-hero of recent months to exhibit a problem with bursting into unexplained, mirthless, and (hence) deeply disquieting laughter. Recalling the much-delayed concession speech she famously withheld until the morning after her 2016 defeat, Clinton says that afterwards, “I just collapsed in the back of the van. [Pause for hearty laughs.] I was like: What. Just. Happened.” According to her, “all the forces [Donald Trump] had unleashed had been rewarded. It made me sick to my stomach.” So, er, why the laughs? She’s Arthur Fleck in a pantsuit.

                        

                  Hillary Clinton                                                           Arthur Fleck      

Needless to say, her loss against the most unlikely Presidential candidate - ever! - was not her fault - it was yours, you naughty citizens!

“People still believe weird, wacky things about me because they’ve been told [laughs in spasmodic, Arthur Fleck mode] that, you know, I kill people, I rob people, I mean who knows what the heck they’ve been told?” Well, we’ve been told that it’s a felony to remove classified information from secure channels but also told that it was okay when you did it, Madame Secretary. But do go on about how the system is rigged against you.

Well, apparently, in this four hour marathon she does go on - and on - and on some more - all totally fascinating, of course, and I shall expect a full report from my 'Yankee-doodle-dandy' friends.

"Halfway between speech and writing"

. ' : ! - ( ) " * = ; / , \ @ and so on and on into the forest of punctuation marks whose exact rules, I must confess, I have never quite mastered despite the very best efforts of Miss Woods, Eng. Lit. & Lang., circa 1950-55.  Today, I still struggle - waddya mean ya noticed already! - so I had hoped for some guidance from a fascinating - well, fascinating to me, anyway - article on punctuation in History Today, wittily entitled "Pause and Effect".  Well worth a read if, like me, you are a constant scribbler with an uneasy conscience over the misuse of punctuation!

Crunch or cruise week for 'DomBo?

According to various commentators this week will set the course for the good ship "HMS DomBo" over the next five years.  Two massive decisions must be made and the ramifications are 'yuuuuuuuuuuge'!  First, what to do about that colossal waste of time and money known as HS2?  As in so many other examples of government indecision, the answer is, to quote the old London expression, "bleedin' obvious" to me - get rid!  

The other is whether or not to invite a hostile country to design and build the controlling software to our new national network?  Frankly, I would rather go without than allow the Commissars of Communist China to stick their malevolent fingers into our most sensitive spots.

As far as 'DomBo' goes, this is the acid test which will tell us all what sort of an administration they are going to inflict on us.  I hope but fear the worst!

 

 

I have been waiting patiently for this!

Like everyone else I have been shocked and worried by the Australian bush fires calamity.  I had my suspicions - based on nil expertise! - but kept them to myself.  Today, they are confirmed by an article at The American Thinker from which I will quote extensively but urge you to read the whole thing - particularly if you are Australian!

No one denies the fires were made worse by dry conditions resulting from a drought and record hot temperatures. But, as measured by the amount of forestland destroyed, the 18 million acres for this year’s fires pale in comparison to the 290 million acres burned to the ground during the 1974 bushfire season. That’s equivalent to the size of France, Portugal and Spain combined, and the 1974 fires occurred years before anthropogenic global warming theory suddenly appeared out of nowhere in the 1980s. 

Of course, bush fires have occurred in Australia with regularity for millennia and long before Europeans moved in.  

According to Australian forester and former acting fire control officer Ian McArthur, climate change did not cause the current crisis:

“Long unburnt fuels [dead trees, tall grass, undergrowth, etc.] in national parks are the primary cause. Basic fire management states that a fire needs oxygen, a heat source and fuel. The only one of those that can be manipulated is fuel. The more fuel, the more intense the fire, the harder it becomes to suppress the fire.”

There is nothing anyone can do about two of the three essential elements of these wild fires - heat and oxygen.  However, there is much that can be done about the third essential ingredient, fuel i.e. dead trees, tall grass, undergrowth, etc.  

In commenting on the cause of the fires, Ms. Devine wrote that “blaming climate change is a cynical diversion from the criminal negligence of [Australian jurisdictions] which tried to buy green votes by locking up vast tracts of land as national parks, yet failed to spend the money to control ground fuel and maintain fire trails.” (Fire trails are roads built in forests to provide emergency access to firefighting equipment and personnel.) [My emphasis]

At this point, 'enter stage Left', and I do mean 'Left', the 'Greenie Brigade'!

Burning ground fuel in the cooler months was standard fire prevention practice, until progressive bureaucrats in Australia’s state and federal governments began vigorously opposing controlled burns in the name of “biodiversity.” According to Frank McKee, senior fire control officer in Boyne Valley, it’s next to impossible to get all government departments to agree to hazard reduction burns on state-owned land. “You have to jump through hoops so high it’s ridiculous,” McKee said.

'It's the same the whole world over', well, as far as California, anyway:

Unless natural ground fuel sources are controlled, there’s not much that can stop a wildfire from consuming vast tracts of wooded land during hot, dry and windy conditions. (That’s a major reason the recent wildfires in California were so devastating: in support of “biodiversity,” a succession of Democrat governors created an inferno-in-waiting by refusing to clear the state’s forests of an estimated 130 million dead trees.) [My emphasis]

My advice to my 'Aussie mates'  is quite simple - burn as many 'Greenies' as you can, er, but only in the wet season!

 

 

 

 

Your Monday Funnies: 27.01.20

Yes, sorry, sorry but I slept in this morning and then got caught for domestic duties - "the horror, oh the horror!"

 

After his exam the doctor asked the elderly man: "You appear to be in good health. Do you have any medical concerns you would like to ask me about?"

"In fact, I do," said the old man. "After I have sex with my wife, I am
usually cold and chilly, and then, after I have sex with her the second
time, I am usually hot and sweaty."

Later, after examining the man's elderly wife, the doctor said: "Everything appears To be fine. Do you have any medical concerns that you would like to discuss with me?"
She replied that she had no questions or concerns.

The doctor then said to her: "Your husband had an unusual concern. He claims that he is usually cold and chilly after having sex with you the first time, and then hot and sweaty after the second time. Do you know why?"

"Oh that crazy old fart," she replied.

"That's because the first time is usually in January and the second time is in August."

 

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

 

A BUSY DAY AT THE PEARLY GATES

The first applicant of the day explains that his last day was not a good one.
"I came home early and found my wife lying naked in bed. She claimed she had just gotten out of the shower.
Well, her hair was dry and I checked the shower and it was completely dry too. I knew she was into some hanky-panky and I began to look for her lover.

I went onto the balcony of our 9th-floor apartment and found the guy clinging to the rail by his fingertips.

I was so angry that I began bashing his fingers with a flower pot. He let go and fell, but his fall was broken by some awnings and bushes.
On seeing he was still alive I found super human strength to drag our antique cedar chest to the balcony and throw it over. It hit the man and killed him.

At this point the stress got to me and I suffered a massive heart attack and died.

Saint Peter thanked him for his story and sent him on to the waiting room.

The second applicant said that his last day was his worst.
"I was on the roof of an apartment building working on the AC equipment and I stumbled over my tools and toppled off the building.

I managed to grab onto the balcony rail of a 9th-floor apartment but some idiot came rushing out on the balcony and bashed my hands with a flower pot.

I fell but hit some awnings and bushes and survived, but as I looked up I saw a huge chest falling toward me. I tried to crawl out of the way but failed and was hit and killed by the chest.

Saint Peter couldn't help but chuckle as he directs the man to the waiting room.  Saint Peter is still chuckling when his third customer of the day enters.

He apologizes and says "I doubt that your last day was as interesting as the two fellows that arrived here just before you.

"I don't know," replies the man. "Picture this, I'm naked, hiding in this cedar chest . . .

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

 

A young married couple has difficulties conceiving a baby, so after a while the wife consults her doctor, who recommends the minor of three possible operations.

The operation is performed, but a couple of months later, she's still not pregnant, so she goes to see the doctor again. This time he recommends the medium operation, a somewhat more serious operation, but still not as complicated as the third alternative.

But, there's still no result, and another couple of months later she's back in the doctor's office, and this time she gets the big one. After having recovered in some weeks, the couple resumes normal marital activities, and this time they actually succeed in conceiving a baby.

Filled with joy, the young wife now sees the doctor for the regular examination during pregnancy and says, "We're so happy doctor, we're finally having a baby. But what was this third operation actually all about? The first two weren't that bad, but this last one I think must have been quite a job, I was dizzy for weeks after."

"Well," the doctor replies, "since the first two standard operations failed, we started suspecting your method rather than your ability, so I made a connection from your throat to your uterus."

 

The Sunday Rumble: 26.01.20

A cheerful start - for a change!   Until this morning I had never heard of 'The Windermere Children' but apparently it is the subject of a programme on BBC2 tomorrow night.  It tells the story of 300 or so Jewish children rescued from German concentration camps at the end of the war and relocated to a new camp near Windermere in the Lake District.  Gradually they were rehabilitated mentally and physically following the unspeakable horrors through which they had - just! - managed to survive.  You can read about it here:

https://www.msn.com/en-gb/news/uknews/the-true-story-of-the-ww2-holocaust-survivors-who-became-the-windermere-children/ar-BBZkPGS?ocid=spartanntp

 

Go, Rupe, baby, go!   Excellent news this morning  to the effect that my 'ex-Best Friend Rupe' Murdoch is planning to open a new radio station to compete with the BBC's Radio4.  Yes, I know the ads will be irritating but I would rather put up with them than listen to the tendentious, 'woke' crap that emanates from Radio4.  Incidentally, 'Rupe' is my best ex-best friend because years ago he ramped up the price of his TV news channel forcing me to leave.

 

The 'Heffalump' in praise of John Profumo:   He, of course, was the naughty boy caught out in the early '60s for his dalliance with the equally naughty Christine Keeler.  I always remember him because, before his fall from grace, I actually met him - for about 3.5 seconds!  I was in a bed in the RAF hospital in Bahrein - no, no, not sick, just skiving and making the most of the most minor of injuries - and as Minister for War he was inspecting the base.  Anyway, he shook hands and wished me well.  I mention all this because the 'Heffalump' has a kindly and forgiving article about the man in The Telegraph today.  Profumo,  was blessed with a superb and wise wife in the form of the film actress Valerie Hobson.  Whatever else, you have to say that he had good taste in women!

 

Oh dear, when 'allies' fall out!   I am a regular follower of both The American Thinker site and The National Revue site.  Between them they give me a Conservative overview of the American political scene.  The Thinker from a very pro-Trump point of view and the NR from a much more doubting and critical standpoint.  Today, The Thinker takes a swipe at The Revue and thus neatly summarises the divide in the conservative view of President Trump.

 

I told you they were 'psycho-babblers'!    For years now I have sneered at what I always refer to as "psycho-babblers".  I am not suggesting that everything they say is tripe, for example, there are, I believe, broad categories of mental states that can - with care! -  be grouped together to aid recognition and to allow some serious scientific enquiry and even treatment.  However, much of what is spouted on the subject is self-serving crap!  Take for example the late David Rosenhan, a 'psycho-babbler' of the first order, as detailed in a book review in this week's Spectator.  Read it and weep!  That phoney Freud has much to answer for.

 

'Theodore Dalrymple' gives Prince Harry a slap:   The volume of words spewed forth in recent weeks since the birth of Harry's and Meghan's son is monumental.  As you would expect, most of it was piffle but thanks to 'TakiMag' the shrewd and highly intelligent 'Dr. Dalrymple' has published his take, not on the birth itself but on the name chosen by his parents for the new 'nipper' - Archie.  Even I, resolutely uninterested as I am in the doings of this, er, particular family, raised an eyebrow when it was announced.  As per usual, Dr. Dalrymple puts what pass for my thoughts into clear, straightforward words.  Give it a read!

 

No more rumbles today

 

 

 

 

 

The omens are not good for the Boris 'n' Dom Show!

You may remember that I expressed some slight nervousness, following their 'yuuuuuuuuuge' victory, that the 'Boris 'n' Dom Show' might provide such an exciting 'opening night' that the show might crash and burn!  Actually, not much has happened.  In fact, I am beginning to sense a certain amount of lethargy!  Nothing much is happening.  I mean, how long does it take to decide that inviting Chinese technology into your national computer network is not so much an example of shooting yourself in the foot as amputating your legs and handing them over to 'Emperor Xi-ping-a-ling'.

Equally, it has been obvious ever since the daft idea first emerged that a high-speed rail-line from London to 'oop north' was always going to be so blindingly expensive and with such meagre returns that it was never worthwhile.  Surely, those bold men of action, Boris 'n' Dom, could have squidged that nonsense in their first week.  So why the delay and revarication?

'MDS' has the answer. She is, of course, 'My Darling Sherelle' [Jacobs] and she points an accusing finger at the glutinous, sticky blob otherwise known as the Civil (non)Service.

Mr Cummings has no choice. He and his small team of insurgents are grossly outnumbered. The old cliche is that the British government is creakingly unproductive. In reality, it is a bilgeing slime of over-professionalised bureaucracy. Whitehall systemically favours oleaginous mediocrities who can slick to the top, by honouring an administrative code of stagnant protocol.

The PPE-nurtured generalists who sit atop will do everything in their power to preserve their meticulously corrupt system. And, struck down with impotent official syndrome and snot-nosed with London anti-populism, their rank-and-file pen pushers are only too happy to help their masters jam the levers of Brexit.

So, come on, Boris 'n' Dom, I don't mind if you drop a few clangers, right or wrong, just get on with it!

 

 

Am I alone in sniggering in delight at the demise of the BBC?

No, I thought not!  In this day and age it is a ludicrous - and dangerous - idea that one particular broadcaster should be supported by legally-enforced taxation on the population as a whole.  Or, to put it another way, I absolutely and definitely do NOT wish to pay the salary of that egregious, 'Greenie' propogandist, Roger Harrabin, let alone all his fellow 'woke', Leftie 'comrades' who never cease preaching and prating their nonsense and who make every effort to stop access to the airwaves for anyone who is likely to be 'off message'.  By all means, let them start their own "Broadcasting Company" - but let them pay for it!

The print media is an excellent example.  If you want 'Leftie' twaddle then you can buy The New Statesman - er, good luck with that one!  If, on the other hand, you want a truly (small 'l') liberal magazine then The Spectator is available.  Both organs, of course, needs must support themselves, not rely on enforced taxation.  Why should the BBC be any different?

 

 

 

A grim week ahead!

Yes, indeed, I am not looking forward to next week. It will be the 75th anniversary of the capture of Auschwitz, forever a bleak symbol of 'Man's inhumanity to Man'.  It will, of course and quite properly, be the subject of 'meeja' attention but I will have to grit my teeth to take it on.  Not that it is the worst example of inhumanity, history abounds with them.  Even so, there is something utterly and completely revolting in the sight of men - and women! - herding other men and women and children into gas chambers to complete an industrial-style elimination of them.  Each time I catch a glimpse of old photos showing the inmates of Auschwitz with their stoical faces pressed against the wire I feel . . . well, actually, I can't quite summarise my feelings . . . a sort of mixture of rage and pity and impotence.  

Not a good week to look forward to!

 

 

 

Pearl Harbour - 'hoonoo?' Kilsoo Haan and Pres. Roosevelt did!

That's the problem for spies, no-one quite believes them!  Thus it was for the late Kilsoo Kenneth Haan (1900-1976).  I must confess I had never heard of him before I read a review in The Spectator of his biography, "Action Likely in Pacific: Secret Agent Kilsoo Haan, Pearl Harbor and the Creation of North Korea" by John Koster.  Kilsoo Haan was an American of mixed Japanese and Korean stock who possessed a network of informants throughout South East Asia during the '30s which allowed him to build up a clear and concise forecast of Japanese actions up to an including the attack on Pearl Harbour.  He passed this on to the highest echelons of the American government including Pres. Roosevelt himself.  The President chose to ignore it!  

I apologise to my American friends but I really do think a complete review of Roosevelt's presidency is long overdue!

 

 

 

So farewell then, Terry Jones, you were a very silly boy!

The death of a 'clown' is always extra melancholy but that of Terry Jones is especially so.  He was the epitome of English silliness!  And, of course, 'silliness' is a vein of humour that runs through English humour for over a century.  Nothing could have been 'sillier' than the Monty Python crew led by Terry Jones which was summed up in the silliest - and one of the funniest - films ever made - "The Life of Brian".

Thank you, Terry Jones, you made me giggle and laugh - a priceless gift!

Grim reading!

But don't blame me!  What follows is a reprint of a comment to a post down below left by my e-pal, Malcolm Pollack, on the subject of the possible/probable likelihood of an American civil war.  It is a thoughtful contribution and I decided to reprint it as a post in it's own right.

Blue and Red have, at this point, wholly incommensurable belief and value systems. They disagree fundamentally and axiomatically about human nature, morality, sexuality, the role of government, respect for family, heritage and tradition, and our duty as stewards of the American nation and culture. As I wrote here back in October:
As the historian Michael Vlahos has been explaining to John Batchelor these past months: you don’t know, except in hindsight, when civil wars have begun. (It strikes me as being much the same as falling into a black hole: once you’ve passed the event horizon, all possible pathways lead through the singularity — even though, to the person falling in, there’s nothing noticeable about the event horizon itself.)

To put that another way: looking at the current chasm in American politics, the fundamentally incompatible visions of America the two sides hold, the degree of dehumanizing hatred they show for each other, the bloody damage already done, and the implacable fury with which they grapple for every atom of power, can any of you imagine some way forward in which the Right and Left just "bury the hatchet" and "hug it out"?

Of course not. This fight continues, and intensifies, until either one side is destroyed, or we work out some kind of divorce.

I don't see any sign of either side giving in or walking away, and there isn't anything like enough commonality left to restore any kind of comity. It goes without saying that this civil war -- which in hindsight we may, in future, understand already to have gotten underway by now -- won't look like the last two American civil wars, with regular armies deployed in military array. It will more likely proceed on a far more granular scale, with constant low-grade violence and disorder, and the occasional regional secession, as the horizontal ligatures that have bound the Republic together all these years gradually break down. Perhaps there will be some geographical sorting as Red folks leave the great Blue urban islands.
I honestly can't see, at this point, how things will get better before they get much worse. (Can any of you?) And I really don't see how America as presently constituted continues for much longer.

Should this occur, it truly will qualify as "Apocalypse Now"!  Lest you think I am being overly dramatic, just think who the winners will be if America dissolves!

 

 

The GOOD NEWS day that keeps on giving!

All together now:

Bang - Bang! Bang -Bang! And another one bites the dust!

I was a bit grumpy on this cold, dismal day until I came up here to my 'eyrie in the sky' and checked my computer for news - well, I wouldn't trust the BBC!  And lo, there was a report that another 'beardie-weirdie', murderous Muslim has been 'offed' by, needless to say, another gang of 'beardie-weirdie',  murderous Muslims.  Such fun!  

  

Apparently the rascal's name is Abdol-Hossein Majdami, the head of some militia outfit.  They can't blame/praise (you choose) 'The Donald' for this because it looks like yet another internal blood-letting.  Let there be more and may be soon they will have 'offed' each other and the normal Muslims can return to a peaceful life.

 

 

If there is a civil war 'over there' it seems to be INSIDE the Dems!

Incredible news which, I regret to say, caused me to giggle!  Apparently, Rep. Tulsi Gabbard (D), a contender for the Democratic nomination for President, has issued legal proceedings against 'HillBilly' claiming the 'wannabe First Lady' accused her of "being a Russian asset".  I have no idea who Tulsi Gabbard is but she is far, far more attractive than 'HillBilly' - so who isn't? - and thus I wish her well in her court action and I hope that it costs 'HillBilly' a packet!  Read all about it here.  Sometimes, just sometimes, I begin to think that there really is a God!

 

 

Seriously, is America edging towards another civil war?

I will be enormously grateful if my American friends tell me I'm an idiot and that there is absolutely no chance of America dissolving into a civil war.  Even so, and in the meantime, I view with increasing anxiety the sight and sound of mounting political hysteria 'over there'.  Needless to say, most of it arises from the political Left but it has to be said that President Trump's, er, 'eccentricity' also contributes to the rise in temperature.  

As seen from 'over here', this farcical impeachment trial is yet another can of fuel to be added to the fire.  We all know it will be 'squidged' in the end but what will that do to the enraged Lefties who rate Trump somewhere south of Al Capone - or even Adolph Hitler?  As the hysteria mounts, some idiot somewhere will be tempted, literally or figuratively, to 'pull the trigger'.  How will the current American political 'elites' cope with that?  I doubt that 'throwing toys out of the pram' will be sufficient!  Nor, I suspect, can the normal legal and political bureaucracies be depended on to enforce stability given that most of them are anything but politically neutral!

I know, I know, I live a 'zillion' miles away and my 'knowledge' is superficial but, dammit, I fear, I fear!

 

 

The stagnant malaise that rots Russia

Only the other day I groaned at the fate of Russia under their current gangster-in-chief, Putin.  In essence, I blamed the Russian people for their quiescent, hopeless apathy.  In a review of a book in The Times last Saturday, I gather that the author, Joshua Yaffa, says much the same thing.  The review is by Roger Boyes and the book is "Between Two Fires: Truth, Ambition and Compromise in Putin's Russia" and is worth a read - if, unlike me, you are prepared to pay the price.  Here is a quote:

"[T]he 40 million who were born or educated during Putin's reign appear to be largely apathetic. He is in their eyes a benign tsar and few question his right to reward favourites or revoke privileges . Yes, urban protesters still turn out, at the risk of being clubbed and arrested, to demand an end to corruption but no serious revolt threatens him.

The lack of a challenge from below has launched hundreds of books seeking to explain the enigma of Putin, his kleptocratic networks and how he plays with national symbols to appear as a heroic figure. […]

He takes his cue from the sociologist, Lev Gudkov who takes a different view, that "there is a feeling of no alternative, that nothing can done, that one way or another you must bow to power or learn to get along with it."

Exactly my opinion which, 'as y'all do know', emanates from a man who knows next to nothing of 'Mother Russia'!  Yet again, I pause and give praise to those greedy, murderous barons who had the gumption in 1215 to force King John of England to sign the Magna Carta Libertatum (Medieval Latin for "the Great Charter of the Liberties") which - natch! - led on to other things they absolutely never envisaged - and would have fought against given the chance!

Oh, the irony, the irony!

 

 

Laurence Fox for Prime Minister!

I'm shocked, I tell you, shocked!  Well, one doesn't expect to hear good sense delivered from the mouth of a 'luvvie', er, unless someone else wrote the words, but the splendid Laurence Fox has done just that - and impromptu words at that!  First of all, he ripped into the 'woke-lot' on BBC Question Time, telling a particularly dim woman in the audience that her criticism of him as a 'privileged white man' was in itself a racist comment - an irony that would have sailed miles over her head!

 

+3

 

 

And last night, according to The Mail, he ripped into Sam Mendes, the director of the film "1917" for introducing a Sikh soldier into the story line as though he was a member of a British regiment.  The Sikhs did indeed fight for Britain in WWI and they fought ferociously and bravely but they did so in their own formations and were never individual members of any British regiment.  I suspect that not many Sikhs will enjoy being patronised by the 'arty-farty woke brigade'!

 

 

That Rebecca Long-Bailey ain't all bad!

Of course, her political and economic opinions are dafter than a really daft thing but she has her good points, too.  I like her frowning disapproval of our totally lax laws on abortion, of which Dominic Lawson writes approvingly in today's Daily Mail:

He informs us that:

She pointed out that while abortions could not be carried out beyond the 24th week of a ‘normal’ pregnancy, it was allowed right up to full term if the unborn child was found to have a ‘disability’. Long-Bailey said: ‘I personally do not agree with this position.’

 

Good for her!  As Lawson goes on to inform us:

 

I am not a Catholic. Nor do I share Long-Bailey’s political views, which are what you might expect from someone who even after the election gave Jeremy Corbyn ‘ten out of ten’ for his leadership. But for personal reasons, I am grateful for her criticism of the way unborn children with disabilities are regarded as suitable for eradication at any time in the womb, unlike those designated ‘normal’. [My emphasis]

 

Politically, the girl might be nuts - but she's got guts!

 

 

Will the European Union last?

And perhaps another question is, do I want it to last?  The chances are that it will last because, in essence, it will be a fight between the dreaded 'Peeps' and the massed ranks and formations of politicians and bureaucrats all of whom have strong personal reasons to keep the racket rolling along.  Do I want it to continue?  Well, I'm not sure.  If it keeps our 'nearest and, er, dearest' in some sort of harmony that is "A Good Thing!"  On the other hand, if some of the constituent members attempt to exert undue pressures in order to 'command and control', that could kick off some major 'fireworks' and that would be "A Bad Thing".

In the end it will all come down to the 'Peeps' and their ruling classes.  Unlike us Brits, they do not, on the whole, deal sensibly with civic dissatisfaction.  They tend to over-rely on their water cannons and truncheons.  The first cracks in the edifice are likely to appear amongst the eastern Europeans.  They have recent and unpleasant memories of being ruled over from far away.  When things do kick off I suspect the response from Brussels will be clunkingly heavy-handed.

Perhaps I am being unduly cynical but, alas, I sense a rottenness at the heart of the European (dis)Union.  

 

 

Your Monday Funnies: 20.1.20

A particularly fine collection today - and that was my first joke!

A Greek and an Irishman are sitting in a coffee shop one day comparing their two cultures.

Over a double latte, the Greek mentions “Greeks built the Pantheon, you may recall, along with the Temple of Apollo.”

“Well, it was the Irish that discovered the Summer and Winter Solstices.”

“But, it was Greeks who gave birth to advanced mathematics.”

“Granted, and it was the Irish who built the first timepieces.”

Knowing he’s about to deliver the coup de grace, the son of Athens points out with a note of finality: “Keep in mind it was ancient Greeks who invented the notion of sex as a pleasurable activity!”

“True enough, but it was the Irish who got women involved.”

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A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, "Please, may I hide under your skirt. I'll explain later."

The nun agreed...

A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, "Sister, have you seen a soldier?"

The nun replied, "He went that way."

After the MPs ran off, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said, "I can't thank you enough, sister. You see, I don't want to go to Syria."

The nun said, "I understand completely."

The soldier added, "I hope I'm not rude, but you have a great pair of legs!"

The nun replied, "If you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of balls…. I don't want to go to Syria either."

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I feel sorry for the hypnotist I saw last night. He hypnotized 7 guys, then dropped the mic on his foot and yelled 'FUCK ME'!

What happened next will haunt me for the rest of my life.

 

The Sunday Rumble: 15.01.20

Hey, schmuks, don't mess with Her Maj!   I haven't read the details - life is short and getting shorter! - but from the commentary it looks as though H&M have been handed their arses on silver salver!  Meghan will not care, she is, after all, a grovelling subject of the Hollywood dynasty - good luck with that one!  Harry will probably feel the self-inflicted wounds as time goes on.  My totally clueless guess is that Meghan's mini-career prospects will gradually wither along with her relationship with Harry and the pair of them will shuffle off into the twilight of obscurity.  I hope I'm wrong, I usually am!

 

With apologies to Matt and the DT:

 

Make Meghan's dad a Duke!   Thomas Markle appears to have more common-sense in the finger he uses to yank open a can of beer than his dippy daughter has in her entire body!  Give him a seat in the House of Lords! 

 

Lord Bercow? Pass the sick bag - quick!   According to reports, 'Jezza' Corbyn, as leader of the opposition, is considering offering Bercow a seat in the Lords.  Presumably he will sit as a Labour peer thus reducing even further the opinion of the dreaded 'Peeps' as to the worthiness of the Labour party.  'Good thinking', Jezza, that should improve your chances at the next election - NOT!

 

Off out for lunch:   Er, with the Memsahib, of course, at The White Post restaurant.  Good grub and superb views across 'Zummerzet'.  Back later . .

 

Sent to me by a friend:  Whose head will surely be chopped off in the Tower!

I'm shocked, I tell you, shocked!

 

A question I asked some time ago:

Asked again by The American Thinker - when and why did "Global Warming" become "Climate Change":

When the accelerated warming trend that began in the 1980s ran out of steam in 1997, what would become an extended levelling-off period set in. Instead of acknowledging their dire predictions of unstoppable rising temperatures were embarrassingly wrong, climate doomsayers came up with a new tag for the alleged threat. What was once referred to almost exclusively as “global warming” was quietly given an alter ego: “climate change.” Since global temperatures were in a virtual flatline, claims of cataclysmic warming were no longer believable. Rather than admitting they were wrong and looking for another way to destroy capitalism, the doomsayers simply switched gears, and invented a clever new trick to frighten voters with terrifying scenarios of imminent environmental calamity. Since runaway warming wasn’t happening, they concocted the specious narrative that extreme weather events, every one of them, are caused by, you guessed it: climate change. Almost overnight, climate change was made the scapegoat for every severe hurricane, drought, flood, heat wave and blizzard that appeared, as if such unpleasant things had never before occurred. 

Couldn't have put it better myself!

 

 

No more rumbles 

 

 

 

"How long until there are no Jews left in France?"

My shocking - well, I was totally 'gob-smacked'! - title is copied from the heading to an article at The Coffee House by Gavin Mortimer.  

Anti-Semitic attacks in 2018 soared by 74 per cent on the previous year and the figures for the beginning of 2019 have revealed a 78 per cent increase on the same period in 2018.

In 2017 an elderly Jewish lady who had undergone constant verbal assaults from her Muslim neighbours was battered to death by a Muslim man, Kobili Traoré.  The French, er, judicial system, er, sprang into action by showing the killer mercy and NOT charging him for murder:

Last month a court showed compassion to Traoré, declaring that he was ‘criminally irresponsible’ for his actions because he ‘was not aware’ of the adverse effects of regular cannabis smoking.

Yeeeeeeeeeees, quite, si tu le dis, if you say so!  Alfred Dreyfus, you are not forgotten!  

According to Mr. Mortimer:

There are 460,000 Jews left in France, and they desperately need more than just the occasional facile tweet from their president about how ‘Jews are and make France’. It happens after every new anti-Semitic outrage but virtue signalling is of no value.

The truth is that the French establishment is in denial, and has adopted the ‘See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil’ approach. Yet evil there is. As one of the Halimi’s family’s lawyers put it this week, the leniency shown to Sarah’s killer ‘is a warning that society is becoming sick’. If this sickness isn’t treated then there will come a day in the not-too-distant future when there won’t be a Jew left in France.

There is something rotten in the State of France!

 

 

Oh no, 'my darling Jane', say it ain't so

For the first time in what seems like an aeon, the rain stopped and the sun shone so I started the day with a light step.  Well, that didn't last long before it turned into a miserable trudge!  For a start, one of our local pubs has started serving cooked breakfast fry-ups on a Saturday morning. I just 'luuuurve' what I call a 'cookie' made up of fried bread, two eggs, sunny side up, grilled bacon, a tomato and some mushrooms.  So, against all my principles I actually dragged my self out of bed and up to the pub for 9.30 - yes, actually 9.30!  It was awful!  Instead of cooking to order it was all displayed in heated pans and it reminded me of the, er, good ol' days queuing up for grub in the army!

So, not the best of starts but on returning I settled down to read The Mail.  Guess what, more and more and yet more about bloody Meghan Markle and her 'Prince Ginger'!  I thought that once they had buggered off to Canada that would be the end of it. No chance!  So I turned to The Telegraph and my favourite opinion writer MDJ - My Darling Janet (Daley).  She proceeded to, in effect, nut me, kick me in the kneecaps and then stomp on my face with a vicious, withering onslaught against President Trump!

Now, as regular reader will know, I am far from being an ardent fan but then I am rarely an ardent fan of any US President.  Alas, for them, they are under minute, searchlight observation 24/7 and being mere men, of course, their blemishes are soon spotted and with an army of opponents waiting eagerly, they are publicised even faster!  Trump's fault lines are all too apparent but they seem to me to be fairly harmless stemming as they do from his 'yuuuuuuuge' conceit, his inability (or indifference) to understanding how others might view his eccentricities and his constant desire to be always and forever at the centre of attention.  Ms. Daley thinks otherwise!

She maintains that his greatest fault is his wanton, almost childlike, destruction of the 'religion' which guides America - the Declaration of Independence, the words of the founding Fathers and the Constitution.  Alas, The Telegraph will not allow me to 'cut and paste' (or steal, if you prefer!) from Ms. Daley's onslaught, so you need to read it for yourself.  Coming from her, it is well worth it!

ADDITIONAL:

Via Zero Hedge I have just read an opinion by Alan Dershowitz, a man worth listening to especially on legal matters.  In essence, he writes that the Government Accountability Office (GAO) doesn't know the law from the hole in its collective arse and nor, by implication, does MDJ (My Darling Jane) I am sorry to say.  Read the link!

 

 

 

 

 

My grumpy 'belly rumble' below needs support from an expert

Yes, sorry for 'honkin' 'n' hootin' in the post below but that wretched, little crook who rules Russia really gets on my nerves!  Happily I have come across an article by a man who knows where-of he writes, from an organisation that has years of experience in studying Russian affairs.  I give you Mr. Nicolai Petrov from Chatham House.  His assessment of Putin's latest moves are set out clearly and knowledgably and are well worth reading - unlike my rant!  Here is a taster:

While Putin mentioned a popular vote on the constitutional changes (which is not required by law), it is important to note that he didn’t use the term ‘referendum’, which would have mandated that the results be acted upon. Regardless, it is clear that, with no easy foreign policy and military wins in the offing, Putin will seek to boost his legitimacy through a popular vote. The current federal electoral cycle starts next year and will end in 2024 with the presidential election.

So, more of 'the same-old-same-old'!

 

 

'Vlad the Impaler' looks after No.1 - so no change there then!

Anyone who thinks Vlad's game of musical chairs at the top of Russia's hierarchy is anything other than a strengthening of his own personal rule deserves 20 years in a gulag!  And, if the troglodyte people of Russia think that their well-being is at the heart of this upheaval, then they deserve the next 20 years of impoverished misery they will undoubtedly get.  What's the Russian for 'suckers'?

Vlad is, was and forever will be, just another strutting little dictator.  At the tactical level of ensuring that those who operate just below the chain of command are left relatively free to pursue their beloved dollars, he is a brilliant and utterly cynical Machiavelli.  At the same time, the dreaded 'Peeps' are kept just above the starvation level but are sentenced to life in perpetual poverty.  Any signs of unrest or dissatisfaction are smashed - instantly.  Anyone brave and/or stupid enough to raise publically any complaints are dealt with very quickly, very efficiently because they are shot dead - end of!

In the meantime his ramshackle nation struts on, seemingly unaware that its boots are worn out, that its shirt is not tucked in because it cannot actually afford shirts and that the only reason its neighbours reluctantly doff their caps is because it is simply bigger than they are.  How long, oh Lord, how long will it take the Russian 'Peeps' to sick up the patriotic gruel that Vlad feeds them - and spit it back in his smug, murderous face!

 

 

 

How dare Bernie Sanders tell the truth?

According to reports of the Democrat TV hustings yesterday, Bernie Sanders accused 'Fauxcahontas' Warren of being liar.  This was shockin', I tell you, shockin' because nobody expects truths to be told at political hustings!  Of course, 'Fauxcahontas' is a liar, indeed, a serial liar, as Ms. Andrea Widburg points out at The American Thinker listing the following examples:

She lied about being a Native American.
She lied about the circumstances surrounding her parents’ marriage.
She stole a New York Times recipe as her own for a cookbook put out by Native Americans.
She lied about being fired because she was pregnant.
She lies about her father having been a janitor.
She lied that her children never attended private schools.

No doubt in Bernie's long political history he has told a few 'porkies' because, of course, he is a practicing politician.  Even so, 'Fauxcahontas's efforts are 'yuuuuuugely' egregious given that respect to different races is, so to speak, a totem pole before which the Democratic party worships!  The Dems are not up to much these days so I can only hope that in the candidate selection they humiliate that ghastly 'lying-liar' of a woman!

 

 

First France, now Germany!

A couple of days ago I wrote a sympathetic post on the rising discontent in France under the, er, charismatic leadership of mini-Macron.  Today I read in The Telegraph that Germany - you know, the powerhouse of Europe - is experiencing a fairly hefty economic decline!  Smile?  Me?  Absolutely not although I confess to the smallest of sniggers when I recall all those 'wiseacres' who warned that Britain would face economic catastrophe if we pressed ahead with leaving the EU! 

Of course, I do not want to see a Europe in decline.  We need prosperous neighbours and not just for trade relations.  Impoverished countries tend to take to the streets to solve their problems and that, of course, never works.  Mind you, if it drives the British economy to look further than just across the Channel and the North Sea, that could be helpful.  After decades of self-induced subjugation to Brussels, now is the time for Britain to look world-wide.

 

 

My blind OUTLOOK

Alas, my 'Outlook', through which I read and send my e-mails, remains out of order.  'SoD' appears to have gone a.w.o.l. so I have approached the mighty, world-wide organisation known as, er, Milborne Port Computers.  I spoke to a charming lady who sensed after about 0.5 micro seconds that she was dealing with the village idiot.  Even so, she was patient and exceedingly competent and after asking me to click this, click that and click the other she decided to hand the problem over to someone else who will call me later on.

It is quite incredible to me that after years spent before a computer screen in which I repeat endlessly various actions literally without thinking but when asked to describe them, what passes for my mind goes completely blank!  Anyway, this is to let you know that I am unable to receive any e-mails so if you have some off-topic messages for me, please leave them in the comments on the blog.

Needless to say, I am now in Grump Factor Max mode!

God, and Bill Gates (if you can tell the difference!), be praised because Milborne Port Computers clicked a few buttons and - hey presto! - all is well again!

 

 

 

'Who are we'? The enemy, 'stoopid'!

The former head of MI6 warned of the danger of allowing the Chinese company Huawei (Sole Prop. the Chinese government!) to gain access to our communications networks.  The Head of MI5, on the hand, says that 'there is nothing to see here move along'!  As an ex-Corporal in that well-known oxymoron, Army Intelligence, I would venture to suggest that allowing the Chinese, in any form, within spitting distance of our critical and strategic networks is either madness or treachery!

Get a grip, Boris!

Réveillez-vous, France!

Yes, of course, I enjoy seeing our nearest neighbour, France, embarrassed or flummoxed but I would not wish it to be seriously injured, especially when it appears to be as a result of self-inflicted wounds!  According to Peter Skurkis at The American Thinker, 'mini-Macron' is attempting to apply the brakes to his country's headlong drive to the edge of total financial and social disaster.

The reforms that Macron proposed were modest. It was basically to raise the retirement age from 62 to 64 and to standardize pensions across the country. Well, the roof caved in.

Needless to say, given the threats of strikes and violence, mini-Macron has been forced into, not so much concessions as total surrender:

"This prompted the government into another hasty retreat saying it would withdraw the proposed age limit change and postpone major decisions on how to keep the [pension] system solvent until it can better assess the situation between now and the end of April."

I just hope they get themselves sorted by next September when a new 'Normandy invasion' will take place, er, that's me and the 'Memsahib' and 'SoD' and some of his friends.  They are all set to inspect the D-day beaches.  The 'Memsahib' and I are determined to inspect that cafes, bars and restaurants (and no doubt the dress shops as well!) of Bayeux.  

Vive La France!

 

 

'Houston, we have a problem - again!'

Bloody-bloody Microsoft are playing silly buggers with my 'Outlook' which means I cannot read any incoming e-mails although, praise the Lord, it looks as though comments are coming through to D&N. This electronic world drives me nuts and I blame 'SoD'!

Your Monday Funnies: 13.1.20

Sorry for the slight delay, 'Nurse Ratchet' required my presence in order to pump me full of something or other but, alas (or hoorah!), the 'gunk' had not been delivered so I was let off - until Thursday!  Anyway, here are your 'Funnies':

A Jewish man was leaving a convenience store with his espresso when he noticed a most unusual Italian funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery.

A black hearse was followed by a second black hearse about 50 feet behind the first one. Behind the second hearse was a solitary Italian man walking a dog on a leash.  Behind him, a short distance back, were about 200 men walking in single file.

The Jewish man couldn't stand the curiosity.

He respectfully approached the Italian man walking the dog and said: "I am so sorry for your loss, and this may be a bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen an Italian funeral like this. Whose funeral is it?"

"My wife's."

''What happened to her?"

"She yelled at me and my dog attacked and killed her."

He inquired further, "But who is in the second hearse?"

"My mother-in-law. She came to help my wife and the dog turned on her and killed her also."

A very poignant and touching moment of Jewish and Italian brotherhood and silence passed between the two men..

The Jewish man then asked "Can I borrow the dog?"

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This next one is especially for our Arkansas reporter, 'JK', and it is not exactly a joke, just exceedingly witty:

[CORRECTION: This was not written by 'Winnie' but by a man called Noah S. "Soggy" Sweat, Jr - no, really, check it out on Wiki! Thanks to Malcolm Pollack for spotting the error.]

Sir Winston Churchill was once asked about his position on whisky. Here's how he answered:

"If you mean whisky, the devil's brew, the poison scourge, the bloody monster that defiles innocence, dethrones reason, destroys the home, creates misery and poverty, yea, literally takes the bread from the mouths of little children; if you mean that evil drink that topples men and women from the pinnacles of righteous and gracious living into the bottomless pit of degradation, shame, despair, helplessness and hopelessness, then, my friend, I am opposed to it with every fibre of my being."

"However, if by whisky you mean the oil of conversation, the philosophic wine, the elixir of life, the ale that is consumed when good fellows get together, that puts a song in their hearts and the warm glow of contentment in their eyes; if you mean good cheer, the stimulating sip that puts a little spring in the step of an elderly gentleman on a frosty morning; if you mean that drink that enables man to magnify his joy, and to forget life's great tragedies and heartbreaks and sorrow; if you mean that drink the sale of which pours into our treasuries untold millions of pounds each year, that provides tender care for our little crippled children, our blind, our deaf, our dumb, our pitifully aged and infirm, to build the finest highways, hospitals, universities, and community colleges in this nation... then my friend, I am absolutely, unequivocally in favour of it..!!!"

"This is my position, and as always, I refuse to compromise on matters of principle!!!"

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WOMEN CAN BE SO INSENSITIVE.....
Ralph returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him he has only 24 hours to live.

Given this prognosis, Ralph asks his wife for sex. Naturally, she agrees, and they make love.

About six hours later, the husband goes to his wife and says, 'Honey, you know I now have only 18 hours to live. Could we please do it one more time?' Of course, the wife agrees and they do it again.

Later, as the man gets into bed, he looks at his watch and realizes he now has only 8 hours left. He touches his wife's shoulder and asks, 'Honey, please - just one more time before I die ?'
She says, 'Of course, dear.' And they make love for the third time.

After this session, the wife rolls over & falls asleep.

Ralph, however, worried about his impending death, tosses & turns until he's down to 4 more hours.  He taps his wife, who rouses. 'Honey , I have only 4 more hours. Do you think we could....?'

At this point the wife rolls over and says, 'Listen Ralph, I have to get up in the morning... ......you don't."  

 

That's your lot, have a good day!

 

 

 

His death is truly a loss

I refer to the late Sir Roger Scruton whose death has just been announced.  I can't claim to be an expert on all of his writings which were prodigious but when I came across him back in the '80s when I was a subscriber to the Salisbury Review, I instantly recognised a ferocious intelligence and intellect which seemed to become keener as he grew older.  Alas, today a brilliant light has been extinguished.

Douglas Murray - who better? - has written an excellent summary of Sir Roger's life over at the Coffee House.  It is well worth a read.

The Sunday Rumble 12.1.20

In which Peter Hitchens agrees - with me!   Well, obviously, that is a whopping great misdirection - or lie, if you prefer! - but I can with accuracy say that in his column today he repeats sentiments expressed by me a few days ago.  I expressed my hope that Labour would succeed in ridding itself of the ignorant loonies who infiltrated it and then took it over completely.  It is critically important because, like every other democracy, we need a functioning opposition, never more so than now when we have a government run by the, er, eccentric 'Boris & Dom' team.  Get a grip Labour and get your act back together!

 

Poor Harry, the Prince who chose exile:   Or, to be more accurate, perhaps, the Prince who was nagged into exile!  Alas, I fear an Edward/Wallis Simpson future for him.  On the surface, no doubt, it will be very exotic as he and Meghan 'cruise' the 'sleb' circuit, well, to begin with, anyway. But "that old common arbitrator Time/ Will one day end it".  Looks and youth will fade, money will shrink, invitations will wither; new, fresher, younger 'slebs' will capture the headlines and then the dread question will be asked - "Meghan who?"

 

More Hitchens!    And no, I am not apologising because he is a writer I much admire.  Today, in The Mail, he demands to know what has happened to the film "An Officer And A Spy" based on the superb novel by Robert Harris which detailed the disgusting campaign which eventually brought down Alfred Dreyfus, a totally innocent French army officer who just happened to be Jewish.  The film won 'yuuuuuge' plaudits when released but then more or less disappeared.  Mr. Hitchens suggests that the fact that it was directed by Roman Polanski, a self-confessed paedophile, is the main reason for its banishment from our screens but he also points out that if we are to be denied access to artistic creations simply on the basis of the artists' disgusting behaviour then we will lose a lot;

If so, what should the BBC do about the sculptures by Eric Gill, which adorn its London HQ? Gill’s sexual crimes were so horrible that I will only say they included incest.

As for the much admired surrealist painter Salvador Dali, his private life (by his own account) was cruel and disgusting beyond belief. Should his pictures be removed from the world’s galleries?

Whilst we wait for commonsense to apply, read Harris's book - it is superb!

 

Taki is still a very naughty boy!   As I keep telling you every time I mention his name.  To be fair, this time it is one of the writers at his magazine who is the naughty one.  I refer to Mr. Jim Goad (No, me neither!) who has provided us all with his choice of the 19 most annoying people of 2019.  To give you the flavour, this is his view of #1: Pete Buttigieg, a 'wannabe' Presidential candidate:

1. PETE BUTTIGIEG
Hey, it’s “Mayor Pete”! He’s the first millennial homosexual mayor ever to make a serious bid for a major party’s nomination. He has never had an original idea in his life, and the only reason he’s gained any traction is because he’s an anus-nuzzling bone-polisher. Blacks don’t like him, Hispanics don’t like him, and radical homos think he’s too boring. Whenever this smarmy little vole starts pontificating about some policy issue or another, all the entire world can think about is that later tonight, he’ll be batting around his husband’s testicles as if they were ping-pong balls and his tongue was a paddle.

Er, well, yes, if you say so Mr. Goad!

 

Look but don't touch!   There is a very 'swotty' article in The Telegraph which suggests that just looking at something alters its state of being.  This might help to explain it for y'all.  

 

Oh, come along, do buck up, it's all very simple really. If you are not sure whether something is a particle or a wave, just look at it!  See?  That quantum physics is dead easy, really!

 

Sound the trumpets, beat the drums!   It looks as though ex-Cpl. Duff might be re-joining the Colours.  Apparently, our (so-called) Ministry of Defence has let it be known that they wish to attract old soldiers back to military service.  They are desperately short of recruits, mainly, I guess, because the delicate youngsters of today are failing to volunteer.  Anyway, I stand ready to return, er, just so long as someone can give me a hand with my back-pack, allow me time for a nap in the afternoon and bring me a hot cocoa at bedtime.

 

No more rumbles

 

 

Gwyneth, darling, I'll take a dozen - for starters!

I have it on very good authority - er, well, actually I am referring to the old 'grump' who runs the I Hate The Media site - who in turn  points me to the Daily Wire.  That, no doubt august organ, informs me that Gwyneth Paltrow who stole my heart in her performance as Viola De Lesseps in that brilliant and witty film, Shakespeare in Love (script by Tom Stoppard), has now launched a personalised candle with, er, an interesting perfume bearing her name.

In fact, it bears more than just her name because in the marketing which precedes its release, she assures us all that she has decided to call the candle, "This Smells Like My Vagina".  Needless to say, I have already ordered half a dozen - no, no, not candles, I mean cases of candles!  I'm sure 'the Memsahib' will be entranced with that, er, delicate fragrance - and if any of you lot tip her off as to what it is called I will come and get you!!!!

Finally, the impeccable (I'm sure!) Daily Wire reports that she gifted herself a vibrator for Christmas.  Silly Gwynie!  She must know that I, so to speak, stand ready at a moment's notice to assist her in that capacity.  Well, perhaps not a "moment's notice", more like a couple of days weeks months whilst I, er, recharge my batteries, so to speak!  

 

 

 

There are liars, lying-liars and then Iranian liars!

So, finally, the Iranians own up and admit the truth that it was them who shot a civilian passenger aircraft out of the sky thus murdering 176 innocent people.  They claim is was done accidentally, so not only murderous liars but incompetent, too!  How 'The Donald' must be smiling to himself inside the White House as his assassination of an Iranian killer is buried at the bottom of the news pages whilst an Iranian atrocity combined with their pathetic and blatant dishonesty takes over the headlines.

'Over here', we, too, are smiling because only yesterday the ultra-smoothie-chops who is the Iranian ambassador to London, was on our TV channels absolutely and definitely assuring us that his government had nothing to do with the destruction of the civilian airliner.  He became the perfect example of that old saying that 'diplomats are sent abroad to lie for their country'!  Also, it  is worth dwelling on what the families of those 50-odd demonstrators who were killed by crushing in Tehran as, er, 'spontaneous' demonstrations broke out in protest at the original American action.  Surely some of them must be asking themselves if this gang of dishonest, mouth-dribbling idiots who rule Iran are really worth dying for?

 

 

Thank you, Meghan, and don't slam the door on your way out!

God, what a relief it has been whilst 'H&M' have been away in Canada!  For a while the newspapers have been informing us of news - real news! - rather than the latest fashion accessories sported by Meghan.  To be fair, whilst she is, of course, a publicity-seeking (at a price?) operator the excessive 'meeja' coverage was not entirely her fault.  The dim, dumb, British public dribble at any gossip concerning those two and 'the dandruff-ridden hacks of Fleet Street' are only two pleased to serve it up.  And, of course, they will continue to do so because if 'H&M' seriously believe that they will now be left alone to pick and choose their own carefully crafted publicity they are in for a surprise!

 

 

Here's some good news - for a change!

The young man in the photo, Master Nicholas Sandmann, was a pupil at a Catholic High School in 1918 when some sort of demo-rally kicked off featuring some old Red Indian 'scrote' called Nathan Phillips, a well known activist on behalf of 'native Americans'.  Master Sandmann did nothing but be a spectator but was caught in a photo opposite Phillips and subsequently the photo was, er, 'adjusted' and the story put about by the 'meeja', mainly the WaPo and CNN, that Sandmann had mocked 'Big Chief' Phillips.  Screeching demands were broadcast that Sandmann should be punished.

The fact is that Sandmann did nothing other than smile politely and - SCHLOCK-HORROR! - wear a Trump-style 'MAGA' hat.  That was enough for the dimwit fanatics at CNN et al to launch their vicious campaign against Master Sandmann.  Yesterday, CNN settled a $275 million lawsuit brought against them by Master Sandmann.  OUCH!  Those useless, lying-liar, Leftie-journos must cost their employers a fortune - I'm delighted to say.  The WaPo and NBC Universal are next up in the dock. 

What can one say except 'ohdearwhatapitynevermind'!

 

 

The problem with Ricky Gervais is that he wasn't nearly rude enough!

As we all do know now, Ricky Gervais was 'yuuuugely' rude to the gathered Hollywood scum stars and starlets gathered for their annual prize-giving.  Alas, he was no-where near rude enough!  Take for example, Ms. Michelle Williams - and no, I have never heard of her before today - who won a bauble at the Globe Awards.  As Ms. Jeannie DeAngelis informs us at The American Thinker, it was probably a good thing that the entry carpet to the ceremony was red because it is possible that Ms. Williams might have left a trail of blood behind her!

Once inside, and despite Gervais's advice to avoid political acceptance speeches, the nominee for best actress in a limited series or television film, Michelle Williams, came prepared to confess that a "woman's right" to kill her unborn children is what gained her access to a carpet stained with both [literally] sewage [there had been a plumbing accident earlier] and [metaphorically] blood.

Ms. DeAngelis continues:

Embracing her prize, Michelle shared that she wouldn't be where she is today if she hadn't aborted a baby or two. The award-winner implied that had she not relegated one of her many lover's children to a red biohazard bag, she wouldn't be as welcome to sit among those in attendance, many of whom likely sold their souls to the Devil for the opportunity to become a star.

Kind of like an unborn child with no control over a fame-hungry mother headed toward an abortion clinic, Michelle explained: "As women and as girls, things can happen to our bodies that are not our choice." Apparently, as one half of the twosome needed to conceive a child, Michelle excuses herself from the process. Furthermore, if she wasn't raped, based on those remarks, Michelle seems unaware she had a "choice" before "things ... happened to her body" that resulted in life. After that, Michelle commended herself by stating, "I've tried my best to live a life of my own making and not just a series of events that happened to me."

Apparently, as I write she is carrying the embryo of a child produced with her current lover.  Ms. DeAngelis advises him strongly to keep an eye on it because you never know when Ms. Williams will be offered another starry role!

 

 

 

A word of thanks to my 'commenters'

As it is the beginning of a new year, I would like to say a word of thanks to my 'commenters' who, so to speak, provide the sauce for my rather plain 'cooking' on this blog.  I am only sorry that I no longer attract the number of political opponents I used to 'back in the day' - who can ever forget 'Larry Teabag' et al?  Anyway, thanks to all for taking the time and the trouble.

“TALLYHO X LET’S GET THE BASTARD.”

You might think at first glance, given the current 'shlock-horror' in 'woke' circles, that my title is taken from radio exchanges between American rocket operators as they guided their missiles into the back seat of the car driving the late, unlamented (except by fellow murderous nutters) Qassim Soleimani.  You would be wrong but understandably so because those words were actually uttered back in 1943 as some very naughty and politically incorrect American P38 pilots swooped in and ambushed Admiral Yamamoto, sending him to his death in the sea which was, I suppose given his naval career, entirely appropriate!  The fact that he had also carefully plotted, planned and executed the surprise attack on Pearl Harbour which resulted in 2,335 deaths is justification enough, one feels.  One can only surmise as to the number of deaths Soleimani would have executed had he lived longer but his sudden termination can be nothing but good news especially if his successors remember that there is a man in the White House just as ruthless as they are! 

My thanks to Mr. Rich Lowry at The National Review for nudging me!

 

 

 

Your Monday *Funny" - note the singular!

I am a tad pushed for time this morning so instead of searching desperately for 'Funnies' to amuse y'all, I decided to copy and print the speech made by Ricky Gervais at the totally ridiculous "Golden Balls Globe Awards" ceremony yesterday.  What, you may ask, are his chances of being invited back to host next year's ceremony?  Somewhere between zero and -100, I would say.

Hello and welcome to the 77th annual Golden Globe Awards, live from the Beverly Hilton Hotel here in Los Angeles. I’m Ricky Gervais. Thank you.

You’ll be pleased to know this is the last time I’m hosting these awards, so I don’t care anymore. I’m joking: I never did. NBC clearly don’t care either – fifth time. I mean, Kevin Hart was fired from the Oscars because of some offensive tweets. Hello [pointing at himself].

Lucky for me, the Hollywood foreign press can barely speak English and they have no idea what Twitter is. I got offered this gig by fax. So let’s go out with a bang. Let’s have a laugh at your expense, shall we? Remember, they’re just jokes. We’re all gonna die soon and there’s no sequel, so remember that. But you all look lovely, all dolled up. You came in your limos. I came here in a limo tonight and the license plate was made by Felicity Huffman. It’s her daughter I feel sorry for – that must be the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to her. And her dad was in Wild Hogs.

So lots of big celebrities here tonight. I mean legends, icons. Look at this table alone. Al Pacino. Robert De Niro. Baby Yoda. Oh no, that’s Joe Pesci, sorry. I love you man, don’t have me whacked.

But tonight isn’t just about the people in front of the camera. In this room are some of the most important TV and film executives in the world. People from every background. But they all have one thing in common. They’re all terrified of Ronan Farrow. He’s coming for you. Look, talking of all you perverts. It was a big year for paedophile movies: Surviving R Kelly, Leaving Neverland… The Two Popes.
Many talented people of colour were snubbed in major categories. Unfortunately, there’s nothing we can do about that. The Hollywood foreign press are all very, very racist. So fifth time. We were going to do an in memoriam this year, but when I saw the list of people that died, it wasn’t diverse enough. It was mostly white people and I thought, nah, not on my watch.

Maybe next year, let’s see what happens. No one cares about movies anymore. No one goes to the cinema. No one really watches network TV. Everyone’s watching Netflix. This show should just be me coming out going ‘well done Netflix, you win everything. Goodnight.’ But no, no, we’ve got to drag it out for three hours. You could binge watch the entire first season of After Life instead of watching this show. That’s a show about a man who wants to kill himself because his wife dies of cancer. And it’s still more fun than this. Okay, spoiler alert, season two is on the way. So in the end, he obviously didn’t kill himself – just like Jeffrey Epstein. Shut up. I know he’s your friend, but I don’t care. You had to make your own way here on your own plane didn’t you?

But seriously, most films are awful, lazy remakes and sequels. I’ve heard a rumour that there might be a sequel to Sophie’s Choice. I mean, that would just be Meryl Streep going, ‘Well it’s got to be this one then.’

All the best actors have jumped to Netflix and HBO, and the actors who just do Hollywood movies now do fantasy adventure nonsense. They wear masks and capes and really tight costumes. Their job isn’t acting anymore, it’s going to the gym twice a day and taking steroids. Have we got an award for most ripped junkie? No, no point.

Martin Scorsese, the greatest living director, made the news for his controversial comments about the Marvel franchise. He said they’re not real cinema and they remind him of theme parks. I agree, although I don’t know what he’s doing hanging around theme parks. He’s not big enough to go on the rides. He’s tiny. The Irishman was amazing. It was amazing. Long, but amazing. It wasn’t the only epic movie. Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, nearly three hours long. Leonardo DiCaprio attended the premiere and by the end, his date was too old for him. Even Prince Andrew’s like, ‘Come on Leo mate, you know, you’re nearly 50 son.’

The world got to see James Corden as a fat pussy. He was also in the movie Cats, but no one saw that. And the reviews were shocking. I saw one that said this is the worst thing to happen to cats since dogs. But Dame Judi Dench defended the film, saying it was the role she was born to play because she – I can’t do this next joke. Because she loves nothing better than plonking herself down on the carpet, lifting her leg and licking her arse hole. She’s old school. It’s the last time, who cares.

Apple roared into the TV game with The Morning Show, a superb drama. A superb drama about the importance of dignity and doing the right thing, made by a company that runs sweatshops in China. So, well, you say you’re woke, but the companies you work for. I mean, unbelievable: Apple, Amazon, Disney. If Isis started a streaming service, you’d call your agent, wouldn’t you? So if you do win an award tonight, please don’t use it as a platform to make a political speech. You’re in no position to lecture the public about anything. You know nothing about the real world. Most of you spent less time in school than Greta Thunberg. So if you win, come up, accept your little award, thank your agent and your God and fuck off.

Oh God, I would have paid good money to be there!

 

 

 

The Sunday Rumble: 5.1.20

Both here and 'over there' the Left is loony:   I have been struck by the Left-wing re-action to Trump's decision to assassinate a man whose entire career has been dedicated to ferocious and murderous campaigns against America's allies and who was planning to extend this ferocity on to Americans as well.  The plan was, er, 'executed' immaculately!  Cue: the Democratic party dissolving into mass wailing and gnashing of teeth.  How odd that when the previous President did more or less exactly the same, it was 'all hail, Obama'!  It is obviously an example of the new colour problem evolving 'over there'; Black Good/Ginger Bad!

 

Meanwhile, 'over here' we can enjoy our Labour loonies:   This morning my TV screen has been filled with 'wannabe' hopefuls desperate to be the new leader of the LMP - the Labour Marxist Party.  I almost yearned for 'Jezza' to come back because this lot were the dimmest, dumbest collection of dimwits I have seen and listened to since, er, well, the election, actually, in which the MLP were as close to annihilation as you can be in a general election.  We all make mistakes but to keep on repeating the same mistakes defies definition.

 

'Anything Republicans do, Democrats do worser'!   Yes, America has its problems and according to the Democrat party it is all the fault of the Republicans in general and Trump in particular.  And yet … and yet … even a quick glance at those 'yuuuuuuuuge' cities that have been completely controlled by the Dems for decades, like 'Noo Yawk' or Chicago or Baltimore will show utter corruption, filth, poverty and conditions which are more fourth, or fifth world than third world!  Which would you rather live in - Calcutta or Baltimore?

 

I hope Boris has plenty of axes:   Well, first of all there is the BBC who need to be decapitated immediately, or at least, have the tax-payers' teat ripped from its greedy mouth!  Then there is this ludicrous HS2 rail system which, allegedly, will get you from London to Manchester eight minutes quicker even if it cost zillions of tax-payers' money.  Apart from the obvious question in this 'whizzy-do' electronic world we live in - who the hell wants to go to Manchester in the first place? - we all know for a dead cert that whatever the budget is today, it will be a fraction of the total cost in the end.  Get chopping, Boris!

 

Aussie news is lost in the smoke and flames!   The Australian, continent-wide fire is a colossal disaster quite beyond my British imagination!  I simply can't get my head around it!  And today I hear that it is likely to go on for months!  Of course, eventually it will end and then, I hope, a full scientific enquiry needs to take place because I suspect that management of the countryside has been a major factor.  Don't let the 'Greenies' and the 'Warmers' influence matters because they will ignore the science and simply chant out their 'religious' beliefs.  In the meantime, if any of my Aussie pals know of any proper fund-raising schemes to help support the distressed and the fire-fighters please let me know.  I want to contribute something and I guess many of my readers feel the same.

 

No more Rumbles 

 

 

 

Who would want the worst political job in the world?

Well, they're queuing up, apparently!  I refer to the vacancy left by the 'execution' of that ineffable idiot, Jeremy Corbyn, hitherto the (alleged) leader of the Labour party.  Why anyone would volunteer to enter that pit of roiling snakes and loonies beats me but - hey! - that's politics for you!  If another mouth-dribbling Leftie wins then he or she can look forward to at least another ten years of electoral contempt and defeat.  If, on the other hand, a soft Leftie wins then they can expect a never ending hail of stones and rocks from the Marxist 'mouth-dribblers' who will shriek "Traitor!" at every opportunity.

Of course, if the 'il-Lib-non-Dems', or what is left of them, had more than three brain cells they would mount an enormous subversion campaign aimed at stripping the Labour party of its semi-sensible adherents and forming a new Left of Centre grouping that would offer intelligent policies aimed at providing what the dreaded 'Peeps' want rather than the sort of material over which your average University student masturbates!

In the meantime, of course, Boris (and Dom) will bumble on and we must all hope that they avoid any major pile-ups because, at present, they are the only government we have!  HOODATHUNKIT?

 

 

 

I am a self-confessed ignoramus!

'Waddya mean ya noo already!'  I have confessed on these pages before the sad fact that after five years in senior school I failed my maths, physics and chemistry exams.  I never saw my actual marks but my guess is that they were atrocious!  I would like to blame my teachers but the fact is that it was my inability to concentrate for more than 5 nano-seconds at a time.  Even so, it is curious that long after I had left school, I suddenly became utterly fixated on quantum physics.  I read - or, to be honest, tried to read - as many books as I could get on the weird and wonderful world that (sort of) exists at the sub-atomic level and even volunteered to attend lectures on the subject.

Of course, eventually I let the subject drop because it began to seem like reading Shakespeare in Chinese!  In the end, we all have to admit our limitations.  However, this afternoon the ashes of my previous fascination were rekindled by a superb essay at The Times Literary Supplement by Samuel Graydon - and 'no', me neither!  Whoever he is, I can tell you that he is a superb writer on what is, not very arguably, the most hideously difficult subject in the world!  Suddenly, all those names I sort of 'hero-worshipped' back in the day as I struggled to make sense of their phenomanally complex theories, came back to me.  What can I say except, 'Sorry, chaps, but I did try'.  Sometimes, just for a split micro-second I would understand and be truly amazed but then - bingo! - it would go, sometimes at the speed of light.

Even so, I urge y'all to give Mr. Graydon's essay a read and just see if 'it presses your buttons', too!