I have it on very good authority - er, well, actually I am referring to the old 'grump' who runs the I Hate The Media site - who in turn points me to the Daily Wire. That, no doubt august organ, informs me that Gwyneth Paltrow who stole my heart in her performance as Viola De Lesseps in that brilliant and witty film, Shakespeare in Love (script by Tom Stoppard), has now launched a personalised candle with, er, an interesting perfume bearing her name.
In fact, it bears more than just her name because in the marketing which precedes its release, she assures us all that she has decided to call the candle, "This Smells Like My Vagina". Needless to say, I have already ordered half a dozen - no, no, not candles, I mean cases of candles! I'm sure 'the Memsahib' will be entranced with that, er, delicate fragrance - and if any of you lot tip her off as to what it is called I will come and get you!!!!
Finally, the impeccable (I'm sure!) Daily Wire reports that she gifted herself a vibrator for Christmas. Silly Gwynie! She must know that I, so to speak, stand ready at a moment's notice to assist her in that capacity. Well, perhaps not a "moment's notice", more like a couple of days weeks months whilst I, er, recharge my batteries, so to speak!
My goodness!
Posted by: Whitewall | Saturday, 11 January 2020 at 22:57
It just gets sillier and sillier.
Posted by: Andra | Saturday, 11 January 2020 at 23:19
That's Hollywood for you, Andra!
Posted by: David Duff | Saturday, 11 January 2020 at 23:40
I can see an opening here for the Bearded Rupert and his American wife. Bottled Royal Farts!
Posted by: Backofanenvelope | Sunday, 12 January 2020 at 10:31
https://itaintholywater.blogspot.com/2020/01/if-you-are-on-budget.html
Posted by: JK | Saturday, 18 January 2020 at 19:13