Come on, Boris, get your 'wellies' on!

I don't expect an 'Old Etonian' toff like Boris to know this but as his country sinks slowly into flood water it is the duty of the Prime Minister to pull his 'wellies' on, shrug into his water-proof jacket and plonk a particularly silly hat on his head - even if it hides his, er, golden locks! - and get out and paddle amongst suffering 'peeps'!  Lurking in the warm, dry, waterproof luxury of Downing Street is just not Prime Ministerial!  Even Winston set aside his tumbler of Scotch in order to visit the bombed out victims in the East End. Yes, yes, I know such 'flim-flammery' produces no practical results but it does improve morale. Failure to do so will be remarked upon and, more important, will produce a result at the next election.

 

 

Comments

[AussieD]

Are you above the high water mark in deepest, darkest Zummerzet Duffers?

[Whitewall]

AussieD, I hope you and yours are managing okay. Bet you could use some of Britain's rain down there?

[AussieD]

G'day Whitewall. All well with my lot. Thanks for the enquiry

Had a little chuckle about getting some of Britain's rain. From fire to floods here. Parts of New South Wales and Queensland are now getting flooding rain which, in terms of the fires, is a good thing.

Hopefully it will also fall in the drought effected areas as much of inland Oz could do with a good soaking.

At the moment where I live in Victoria we are getting a pretty typical summer storm. No wind, lots of thunder and good rain. Bloody grass will now reach epic length and I have only just mown the lawns.

[Loz]

Boris has the right idea: Stop whinging about the bloody weather and get over it.

And I love the way he's turned climate change on his head by saying, "Well it's all climate change, so there's nothing we can do about it except repair and move to drier areas". The BoJo equivalent to today's northern greenies of Norman Tebbit's "Get on her bike" to the northern lefties of yesteryear!

Some quotes for those outside the DT paywall ..

Homeowners should no longer automatically expect to be protected from major floods, ministers will announce in the coming weeks.

Under a radical policy shift drawn up by the Environment Agency, flooding will be seen as inevitable due to the predicted effects of climate change.

Instead of spending millions on “limitlessly high walls” and barriers, the government will help people to rebuild their water-damaged homes or to move away from flood-risk areas.

The radical new approach will be revealed in the National Flood and Coastal Erosion Risk Management Strategy for England, due to be published in the spring.

According to a draft version of the document, the effect of rising global temperatures demands a “different philosophy” which means “accepting that some areas will flood and erode and enabling local areas to achieve a managed transition”.

“We need to move from the concept of protection to resilience – property owners should be encouraged to build back better after a flood,” it adds.

Boris Johnson also faced criticism after he refused to visit flood-hit areas or call a COBRA meeting to discuss the emergency.

Cobra meeting, my arse. Wtf is wrong with you?

SoD

[Loz]

"Get on yer bike"

Sorry Norman.

SoD

[Loz]

If he's admitted he can't and shouldn't try to control the weather, how about admitting the same for people?

Rejoin the single market? Singapore-on-Thames?

The only two choices for Blighty to survive and thrive.

Get on it!

SoD

[Glesga]

The Scottish Nationalists have so far not blamed the Tories and English for the inclement weather. They do continue to moan at their usual alarming rate, you use the mute button on the TV handset.

[Loz]

You make a fair point there, Jimmy. There's never so much as a single MacWhinge whenever it pisses with rain, wind and snow up in your neck of the woods. Meanwhile a chorus of Norf-whingers resounds from the Watford Gap to Hadrian's bloody wall.

SoD

[Loz]

Ah, here's my chance at last! ...

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/tax/self-employed/heading-breakdown-tax-rule-changes-pushing-freelancers-edge/

One in three contractors are suffering mental health problems or contemplating suicide because of impending changes to IR35 rules

There, a SoD-whinge. Never one to be left out.

DomBo, take your wellies off, put your footy boots on, and kick that ruddy IR35 legislation into touch, FFS.

SoD

[Glesga]

SOD, my old da was born 1911. He went through the depression and other shit. He served in the Middle East 1940-46 and attained the same rank as Cpl Duff. He came home and worked until he collapsed then he retired. I never heard him moaning and he was loved by his eighteen grandchildren who he entertained. My mother's English family visited when I was young and he had them all sitting on the table and sideboard singing and this was during the late fifties. They never forgot him..I detest fuckin moaners.

[Loz]

Yeah, but when in Rome, eh, Jimmy?!

I hope Bonnie Scotland gets to go its own way on immigration. Who's gonna wipe all those dribbly ginger botties in care homes, serve pints of heavy, and bring in the rye harvest?

SoD

[Glesga]

Loz, the immigrants will find their way to England! We could do a Castro and send the civil servants out to bring in the harvest. The shock would have them leaving for England.