That God-bloke's 'avin' a larf! Well, really, we've had three months of non-stop drizzle, rain, drizzle, rain until we (alright then, me!) nearly went mad and then the most gloriously warm and sunny Easter arrives just as that bloody virus goes mad and keeps us all locked up indoors!
Meanwhile, 'over there' the Dems have gone mad! It is difficult for an Englishman to discuss President Trump. To us, he appears to be from Mars! Not, mind you, that he appears to have done anything 'yuuuuuugely' wrong, indeed, just the opposite, no wars have been declared and, prior to this 'virus-thingie', the American economy seemed to be doing rather well. Also, we Brits need to remind our insular selves that Trump's eccentricities are considered not in the least eccentric 'over there'. In fact, just the opposite, they are much admired by zillions of his "fellow Americans" which means that the Democrats have an exceedingly tough job in trying to remove him from office next Autumn. What do they do? They pick a very decent, old 'codger' to whom you would offer your seat in a crowded train. A 'good ol' boy' who shuffles along but has difficulty remembering what happened an hour ago - oh boy, do I know that feeling! He has zero appeal to the zillions of young 'Lefties' to whom he should appeal if he is to stand any chance. All he can rely on is Trump putting his (in)famous words into practice and 'grabbing some lady by the pussy'. I think - I hope! - he knows not to do that!
The 'Hefferlump' on Hitler's biography: Of course, I am referring to Simon Heffer who has a review of "Hitler Vol II: Downfall 1939-45" by Volker Ullrich about which I wrote with some enthusiasm a week or two back. It is, of course, a total irony that I have paused in my reading of Herr Ullrich's book in order to read the 'Hefferlump's' superb history of the opening of WWI. Even so, Herr Ullrich should not despair because despite my nausea in reading anything about that dolt and madman, I will return to it eventually.
Pity the poor politician - oh go on, try! One of them, either Boris or Raab, will have to take the decision as to when the 'lockdown' is to be lifted. The economic shambles that will follow this gross interruption to normal life will be 'yuuuuuuge' and the government will be blamed. Equally, if the lifted lockdown results in a second outbreak of 'lurgi' then - guess what! - the government will be blamed! Do I feel sorry for them? Not in the slightest - they fought tooth and nail for the job so let them take the consequences!
For my e-pal, 'Whiters', a tale from Tom Stoppard: 'Whiters', as I am sure my regular readers will know, is a keen fanatical angler so I thought Stoppard's essay in The Spectator might amuse him:
The trout season opened on 1 April. I was given my first fly rod 70 years ago. Since moving to Dorset, my fishing has been on a chalk stream so small and so tricky that the only way to fish it is to walk up the middle in chest-waders with a seven-foot rod. The last time I was on the water I slipped and went under, since when I haven’t been sure whether I’m still fishing. Lockdown shelves the question for the time being. I wait for further instructions from the government.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Your Easter Sunday Rumble
Americans really are nuts! Or, to translate that into English English, 'Americans really are eccentric'! This morning, idly flicking through the TV stations to avoid any mention of the dreaded 'c'-word, I came across a programme devoted to American cowboys indulging in bare-back riding on bulls! And, I should add, these bulls had enormous, terrifying and exceedingly sharp horns! The 'rides' only lasted on average approximately 5-secs but it surely must have been the longest and most uncomfortable 'ride' for any of the nutters brave young men who undertook it. Apart from the dangers of a maddened, 20-ton bull leaping around like a Dervish, consider for a moment that there are no saddles! Yeeeeees, quite! As I said, they're all nuts - or perhaps, thinking about it, they lack any 'nuts' at all!
Sorry, JK, I can only give you "E for Effort": I read somewhere this morning, although I'm blessed if I can remember where, that Arkansas only finished 4th in the gun ownership tables amongst the States of America! Whatever, you do, JK, don't move to another State because your absence, along with your armoury, would drop Arkansas to 18th!
The 'chequered flag' falls on Sir Stirling Moss: Truly one of the greats of motor racing. Alas, I never saw him race but his reputation will live on and on . . .
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Your Easter Monday Rumble
What happens next? I am tempted to reply "Who knows and his brother 'Fuck'!" but that, of course, would be crude and rude and unsuitable for a distinguished blog such as this - and I heard that! Even so, attempting to work out how the world will be after this cataclysm is exceedingly tricky. Obviously, there are going to be 'yuuuuuuuge' financial ramifications both on a national and personal level and the largest of them will be debt. Happily, we can rely, to a certain extent, on 'greedy' capitalism re-asserting itself to the benefit of most of us in the long-term. However, national and international debt, as always, will act as a dampener and when you throw in the priority of perceived national political interest as a priority over all else, then the difficulties of reaching recovery increase enormously. What will be required from the international political leadership is wisdom and patience - 'yeeeeeeeeeeeeees', quite!
Non, Monsieur, do not pull that handle! Amidst the 'doom 'n' gloom' this will provide a chuckle. According to The Telegraph, a 64-year old, French pensioner was given a surprise flight in a French fighter plane. It was arranged, secretly, by his, er, 'bon amis' and he felt impelled to accept it. The Air Force pilot put the aircraft through some tight manouvres and the old man in the back reached for something to hang on to. Alas, it was the trigger for the ejector seat which promptly blasted him out of the aircraft. Quelle surprise!
Spare a thought for the 'luvvies': Oh, go on, try! I refer, of course, to all those actors and actresses who are now out of work and with absolutely minimal chances of employment in the near future. Mind you, it's all happened before. Poor old Will was forced to forsake London and retreat to Stratford during the plague. Mind you, it gave him some respite and time to dream up some more inventions - so not all bad, then!
More Rumbles over the Easter period . . .
Recent Comments